Homework excuses! I need your best!

the-east-isnt-that-bad

the-east-isnt-that-bad

Active member
Well I can't really say much about why I need them or anything, but I do, so please post your best (and worst if it has some humor value) and help me out a whole bunch!

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On my way to goddom no more!!!

I'm a fucking NS GOD!!

-+-+Davey And Waldo Go Drinking+-+-

-Aaron
 
my teacher seriously believes us that our dog ate it, cuz her dog ate he lesson plans one day, all we have to do is show it to her, so like write some shit on a paper and have your dog chew it

I HEART MEGHAN

'hey joel do you have pics of your g/f?' 'no, but youll see her around' 'i heard she gets around, thats why shes takin john to court for rape'- me, on joel goin out with amanda

 
this one kid in my history class was gonna tell the teacher his dog ate it but it was sitting on his desk so he started bitting it and ripping it. then told the teacher my dog ate it. she believed him

_______________________

powder to the people

pigtail productions
 
haha, crayons! that's awesome!

anyways, I need a lot more than that, so any help would be greately apreciated!

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On my way to goddom no more!!!

I'm a fucking NS GOD!!

-+-+Davey And Waldo Go Drinking+-+-

-Aaron
 
I havent heard word homework for 2 years now and I couldnt be more happier...

-People say marijuana ruins your life, I just say I take the scenic route-

 
how about

'i had to play baseball all night and i didn't ahve a chance to do it....'

My friend\'s and I formed a NO GIRLS ALLOWED club when we were little. Then we gave it up when girls made my penis get hard

-midwest_rep

r u sayin we r being censored by da goverment?

fuck pussy dick suckin lips

-freeze_pooter

 
chocolate frosting is ur answer. smear it on ur paper and say u left it in the bathroom last night and someone wipped their ass with it. she wont go near it

are fat people bad americans?
 
Just say 'fuck you and your fuckin lame ass homework. I fuckin got some shit to do that happens to be more important than writing some bitch little paper so save your fuckin bull shit for someone else!' that always charms em

Jesus saves!

Gretzky gets the rebound. he feeds the puck to LeClair. he shoots! he scores! the crowd goes wild
 
my dog died.family crisis, please give me an extension(they usually don't ask what happened and if they do say it's personal). i was to high/drunk.

I AM A SKIER.
 
Ant4Life said, 'I havent heard word homework for 2 years now and I couldnt be more happier...'

it sounds like it, maybe you should get back in school.

________________________________________________________

Jack and Jill went up a hill riding on an elephant. Jill got down to help Jack off the elephant.

 
I left it in my locker... then take off to the library to finish it...

althought what I found worked best for me during high school.. was just telling the teacher the truth and just be like Im so swamped with work its half done I can show that half but i had blah blah blah due for someone else and I really need to work on my time managment skill... HONESTY!! works wonders

I do whatever my rice crispies tell me too.

A blue whale ejeculates 40 gallons of sperm at a time and people wonder what jelly fish are?!!?
 
Write half of your assignment and then fill the other page's with blank page's..When you teach find's out say oh shit they must have not printed!

..Seth Pistols rock my fuckin socks..
 
A good one that works every time for typed homework. Type an amazing intro for a paper, then for the rest just write complete crap, then hit print and as it comes out pull on the paper strencthing and deforming the words hand it in with 3 pages of this, and you'll get away for not doing it for a couple days. It's works on my teachers!

*~Jay~*
 
what i do, is when the teacher is handing back the homework, and he/she doesnt hand yours back to you(since you didnt do it), just be like umm i turned it in and you never handed it back to me. And then be like well since u lost it can u just give me credit anyways

 
the problem with computers these days is that everything is backed up on ur hard drive. saying ur dog ate it these days will get you a max 1 day extension so you can print it out again. crayons is brilliant, tho.

_____________________________________________________________

I'm so constipated I've become a prune juice conesuir (sp)

'peter north is fucken awesome, hes got a big rod and blows gallons of semen on fresh 18 year old faces

-lateralis

'It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.'

-Dubya.

'I would never do crack... I would never do a drug named after a part of my own ass, okay?'

Denis Leary.

'You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.'

'Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.'

'Cocaine is God's way of saying your're making too much money.'

Robin Williams.

'I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example.'

 
any more?

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On my way to goddom no more!!!

I wish I were a fucking NS GOD!!

-+-+Davey And Waldo Go Drinking+-+-+Above All Magazine+-+-

-Aaron
 
i once told a teacher we had an industrial accident at work and everyone had to stay to be checked out and interviewed and i couldnt leave

member#13687

'do i look gullable to you , or even a gulla-calf?'
 
i didn't have time to do my hw cause i had to put my attetion towards my herpes... it was just getting out of hand

~~~CCskiBum~~~
 
just cry and tell you were beaten while goin to school and your bag was stolen

*******************

PUNK'S NOT DEAD!

RAILS SUCK!

POWDER SKIING RULES!

DEATH TO SNOWBOARD-ERS!!

VOTE BUSH!!
 
put on an orange jumpsuit and get your friends to dress up in ski masks with toy guns. Make a video saying you got kidnapped and post it on an islamic website. that should buy you at least 2 weeks. If you want you could demand a ransom and score a quick mil easy while you're at it.

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'Dude, check out this nasty gouge.'

'Your mom has a nasty gouge.'

'221 is fucking hilarious'

~221
 
Crayons is retarded do any of you think...Unless its like a black crayon the teacher will stil be able to see what you wrote... and if you didnt write anything or wrote complete bs they will be able to tell that...

 
my mom is bringing it at lunch. i'll give it to you at the end of the day. (don't bring it at the end of the day). the next day, hand it in and say you forgot to come after school.

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Good Fun With A Hand Gun.

NO MORE BU** SH**
 
Awesome!

haha, I gotta try some of these...

Anyways, keep adding them if you want,but that should be more than enough...

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On my way to goddom no more!!!

I wish I were a fucking NS GOD!!

-+-+Davey And Waldo Go Drinking+-+-+Above All Magazine+-+-

-Aaron
 
run it over with the lawnmower and say you were outside when the wind blew it on the lawn and your dad mowed it. That actually happened to me once, just put the shreddings in a bag

======================

Formerley 'Skierguy48' orginal member # 30,116

E.C.S.M.
 
Yeah all you kids saying 'CRAYONS WHAT AN AWESOME IDEA' probably arent smart enough to graduate highschool anyway...so by all means go try the crayon idea you dufus'

'Don't fuck with me 'cause I'm going to delete everything you ever post and have ever posted - Flanker, A moderator
 
sorry, just posting because I accidentallydeleted it from my threads...

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On my way to goddom no more!!!

I suck at life...

-+-+Davey And Waldo Go Drinking+-+-+Above All Magazine+-+-

-Aaron
 
i always use, 'i didnt feel like it'

~*Michelle

->'the CD goes right here. the speakers...oh well one of 'em's broken, but THIS speaker is good, and these wires, they are really good!'

'I dont think rich will ever be an insult. That's like calling someone pretty and trying to offend them.' *ICE-IS-SCARY

 
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