Hit Jesus in my car

Ruski

Active member
wow. so i my neighbor was having a yard sale (we share the begining of our driveway). i went in reverse to get out went to change the song on my cd player and didnt notice that there was a statue of Jesus (christmas style with a solid heavy base). needless to say Jesus isnt doing too well and i now have a dent in my car...im reconsidering my stance as a holiday only christian
 
jesus probably didnt like the way his ass looked in that statue anyway. you should be fine.
 
Well now that you've killed him you're going to have to:

1)Find some nice white cloth to wrap him in.

2)Find some giant stone tomb and put him in it.

3)Roll some heavy ass stone in front of the opening.

4)Write a 1000 page fiction novel on how your statue mysteriously came to life and moved the giant stone out of the way then floated away.

5)Have half the modern world believe your story in 2000 years.
 
I couldn't have said it any better. Well i could have changed "chick" for "dumb bitch".
 
Yep - Hell for sure. I think it is somewhere in the Old Testement - Thou shalt not run over the Christ figure yest ye be damned to fire and brimstone, forever. Amen.
 
I don't know if God is going to be very forgiving about this kind of shit - you might be in for plagues and all sorts of Biblical motherfuck.
 
dude your so lost...

i feel bad for you, but thn again i dont cuz you just insulted the heck outa christ by calling him a liar and callin the bible a fiction novel.

 
jesus was a real person. christians worship him, muslims acknowledge him as a prophet. hindus believe he was someone special. scholars agree he most likely existed. you are in the minority in your belief in him never existing. whether or not he was the son of god is debatable but he was a person who walked the earth. I don't have a problem with anybody who believes god isnt real but when athiests get their elitist attitude and make fun of religion that really makes me mad. Its considered the politically correct thing to respect other peoples beliefs just as you would respect a persons race, nationality, sex, sexual orientation but some athiests still feel the need to go on the internet and defame peoples respective gods.
 
its just a joke

sry to any girls on NS that are offended...

the only reason im appologizin to NS girls is cuz theyr the only ones that dont deserve to get ragged on bc of thier driving...

they ski so thier alright in my book.
 
thats what you believe but no matter what you offend alot of people and thats why most people who believe in god dont like athiests because you feel the need to be complete buttholes
 
its just pretty rude to be blasphemous of other peoples gods. you wouldnt go to the mall and scream "jesus titty fucking christ" would you?
 
why are women such bad drivers....

cuz u dont need a stearing to work an oven...

womendrive.jpg
 
i watched it twice. the first time i was open minded and the second time i fact checked different sources. it was mostly bullshit. kind of like some loose evidence glued together by blatant lies
 
Yes. The christianity stuff is very factual actually, and the last section talking about our self-perpetuating debt is true. The 9/11 thing, however convincing it may be is too late to do anything about sadly, even if it were true, and kind of takes away some of the credibility of the movie.
 
This is exactly what i find so amusing about devout christians. Because if you don't believe in their God, it's all: "You're so lost", "You haven't been saved yet" , "You need to find Jesus" and so on. Real classy.
 
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