Gross stuff you do when noones around

I stand on my head for as long as possible and the only words that come out of my mouth are swear words..
 
My brother used to be able to fluff on command. I made him do it one day infront of all his friends and a whole bunch of my friends. He tried and tried but could barely fluff. He did end up making a feeble "PHLEAUUGH" noise and it wasn't very loud. I looked down at where he was trying to fluff, and I saw a little poop nugget. He had already ran away because he pretty much launched in his pants. But I grabbed a paper towel and picked up the lil poop steak nugget and threw it in the downstairs toilet before anyone noticed. I tried to save him the embarassment because afterall it was I who made him do it in the first place.

I fluff in my hands and put it in someones cup if they're not looking.

I smell my own fluffs sometimes.
 
well you could at least qoute me properly and say who said it an stuff i didnt say "its the perfect crime" i said its the perfect place to wipe them
 
i think it should have goe more like this:

"the other day i caught my self wiping a booger on my cat. its the perfect place to wipe them, they clean themselves all the time, it's like recycling"- winndeburlo

and that is how you properly quote someone
 
pick my nose but honestly who doesnt. when u got one of those sharp ones that cut ur nose up like whn ur skiing u just have to pick
 
regurgitate my food, chew it up a little more, and then swallow. The moment I stop getting new pieces, I stop. It's especially tasty after chinese food!
 
This is what i do.

head%20up%20ass.jpg
 
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