Funny chair lift rides

one time my mom went skiing with out me, and i went on the chairlift with one of those african americans
 
ahhaaha i love doing this. "how's that scrotum infection?" "it was oozing pus big time last night, but the doc said it will be fine in a few weeks."

"who do you think you got it from?"

"man it was probably rj, he was pulling my balls and his nails were dirty as fuck."

we could go on and on. my improv skills have gotten considerably better lol
 
Got put with a group of 2 and another single for the summit lift at Wachusett. Kind of sat in the corner and listened to my music. Lift stopped half way up though, and didn't start for like 30 minutes. We all ended up telling ghost stories. Was pretty funny, had a pretty cool time.

Then when we got close to the top some gaper tried to jump off a bump next to the lift, flails his arms to the left to try and throw a 3 and just slams into the lift tower, screams and then slowly starts to pick up his gear. We all thought he died, was pretty funny
 
I was once on a chair with a guy from Texas named Joe. Frickin priceless. Had to try really hard to hold it in till i got off the lift.
 
A while back I was in Whistler during the summer. Some old guy in a full blue with white pinstripe Sun Ice suit got on beside me. He had long blonde hair but I think he dyed it slightly blue. Fucking hipster. Anyways, he started crying like a little bitch because he was so scared of the chairlift. I'm pretty sure he said he was on NS or something. I think his name may have been Doug but I wasn't really listening to him because he was clearly a gaper. Anyone know which member this is?
 
one time when I was skiing alone I got on the lift with two other guys, during the lift ride I over heard the two having a conversation and found out that one of them was an ex-convict who had been convicted of murder and had just been released. one particularly interesting thing I heard the guy say was "just cus I was carryin' a gun down the road don't mean I shot the guy" he also asked me if I had "found god". that lift ride was pretty funny... in a traumatizing sort of way.
 
just the other day I was taking the singles line and I was riding with these 2 girls and a guy and they thought I was listening to music. They kept talking about awkward lift rides and how the lift ride would have been awkward if I wasn't listening to music, and the whole time I was just sitting there silently.
 
you should have replied right as you were getting off the lift, "your right, that was a pretty awkward lift ride" and just rode away as silently as you left. or something to that effect.

one time while on a lift with a lady about in her early 30s max and me and 2 friends, we decided to try and make it awkward and were talking about fingering girls and whether or not you could get aids while fingering her with a small cut on your finger. i don't think the lady heard about the cut but then she proceeded to give us an enlightening sex talk about how you can't get aids from fingering as well as several other possible ways to get it. she was pretty funny
 
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Well once I got on the lift with a mother with her 2 children. I was listening to some music and right between 2 songs I heard her say to her children: "Stay away from guy´s like that, the ones with the big clothes". I looked to the left to find them all staring at me. It was pretty funny
 
My and a buddy got on a lift next to these two guys that were talking about how much they had spent on cocaine. It was an interesting ride.
 
Once, I had a man snort coke from a McDonald's toy bag next to me and 2 of my other buddies. I shit you not.

Other than that, I find it funny to piss off of the lift with randoms on with me.
 
had two older FIBS (fucking illinois bitches) on the chairlift with me and asked me if i was any good. of course i went on to say how i was fully sponsored by K2, Full Tilt, and Saga as well as I was at the X Games this year and they believed me.
 
so one day i just finished a lesson and decided to go do a few hot lap by myself but in the chair in front of me there was my friend another ski instructor and my other that was helping her but at the end of the ride when they lift the bar a kid fell off head first wasn't really funny but it was pretty traumatising but the girl ended up being fine
 
I was on the chairlift and this old guy started asking us why his grandchild wanted to snowboard instead of ski and what was wrong with him and why would he want to do that if skiing was so fun, and every couple sentences he would start talking in a different language. It was so hard to try not to laugh.

And first page claim!
 
on the life with my friend and a gaper father playing music out of my headphones pretty loudly

gaper father: "turn down your music, its profane"i respectfully silence the music

he proceeds to make a phone call to his kid in the lodge

i hit up the barry manilow copacabana at max volume

we groove to it the rest of the ride up
 
Last year I was in the line about to go up with my two friends. They jumped in front of me and grabbed two empty spots on the chair just leaving. I got on with this old guy and his two daughters. My friends turn around and start laughing at me, because I'm just chilling with this old racer dude. He turns to me and says "I missed the joke." I was like me too. Then he started telling really shitty ski jokes about people falling off cliffs and stuff. It was weird.
 
I was skiing my ON3P Jeffrey's with the ferret topsheets. The girl I was on the lift with was rocking these women's skis called the beavers. We had a solid conversation about our respective rodents.
 
On the cabriolet at The canyons this enormous Somoan dude told me he was a Special CIA operative and then gave me a parol note and a weird handwritten mission briefing or some shit. He said he was looking for a rapist and that if I gave it to the police theyd give me $10000. When we got to the top he just walked away. Kinda odd to say the least.
 
Yea I have friends from Illinois that ski but some of the ones that come to GP are fucking annoying and just rich gapers who think they rule the hill
 
I was on the lift with my friend and these 2 older ladies. My buddy dropped his slushie cup into the unskiable forest area inbetween the runs. This lady starts lecturing him about littering and how he would feel if he skiied over that. He replied well its in the unskiable terrain, she still tried to convince him how he was wrong. It was hard to hold my laughter in.
 
My buddy hocked a loogie off the chairlift right near the top once, and for SOME reason there was a ~10 year old girl laying in the middle of the trail right under the chairlift. Splattered all over her goggles, could not hold in laughter.
 
thats why i said "hill" if you refer to my post. and no there arent any rich gapers in WI we are all way to good to be gapers
 
I had a guy seriously ask me if i had been skiing in the "trick ditch" when i realized he was talking about the half pipe i couldn't help but laugh my ass off
 
me and my friend were on the chairlift with this one middle

aged guy who was talking about how much he loved skiing pow pow at tremblant and

that once, back when he was a ski patroller, he saw a girl cut her

whoha on her snowboard accidentally while trying to get off the chairlift. not funny, just weird as fuck
 
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