For all of you who think gays are evil because of what the bible says, read this

Paul-o-Rama

Paul-o-Rama

Active member
This is an open letter to Dr. Laura I found floating around the internet. Although this letter in particular addresses Dr. Laura, I feel that it can be applies to all bible thumping xtian fundamentalist who wave the all knowing book in our face. Your book is full of hate, murder, disdain, and should not be taken serious.

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your radio show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific Bible laws and how to follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors bitch to the zoning people. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. What do you think would be a fair price for her? She's 18 and starting college. Will the slave buyer be required to continue to pay for her education by law ?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense and threaten to call Human Resources.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? ....Why can't I own Canadians? Is there something wrong with tham due to the weather?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should this be a neighborhood improvement project ? What is a good day to start? Should we begin with small stones? Kind of lead up to it?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than

homosexuality. I don't agree. I mean, a shrimp just isn't the same as a you-know-what. Can you settle this?

g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading

glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here? Would contact lenses fall within some exception?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die? The Mafia once took out Albert Anastasia in a barbershop, but I'm not Catholic; is this ecumenical thing a sign that it's ok?

I) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing

garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really

necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev.24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted disciple and adoring fan
 
i have seen it before... but thank you it was good to refresh my memory. ahh i love bashing religion.. it is so outdated, i have no idea how anyone could follow it.
 
somebody is gonna come and say that all those things are from the old testament and therefore don't apply, but all the verses condemning homosexuality are from the old testament as well, so anybody who feels like trying to use that argument, suck it.
 
"Your book is full of hate, murder, disdain, and should not be taken serious"

oh geez. come on man. youre out of control. youre clearly not going to be counting the new testament, since that collection of writing is essentially all love and peace. this being the case, you must be refering to the old testament, where all those quotes in that letter come from... in which case you need to be addressing the Jewish folks, not Christians.

but just for kicks... heres some of that hate and murder that you think we ought to go ahead and throw out...

"better is the poor that walkedth in his integrity, than he that is perverse in hids lips, and is a fool" (proverbs 19:1)

clearly, teaching honesty is murderous!

or maybe we should do away with the psalms... some of the great poetry that has ever come down to us through the ages... you know, teaching benevolance, mercy and charity are pretty bad... we should probably not take that stuff seriously either.

in short, you dont sound anywhere near qualified to speak on the subject at hand.
 
i know you didnt write the letter, but you did write that its a book full of murder and hate that we shouldnt take seriously... didnt you?
 
well, if you didnt write anything that you posted, can we assume you agree with it? i mean, you did post it and all. which, when you think about it, is even weaker than if you had written some of it. now youre just a copy/paster. that cant feel good.

either way, my first post is still accurate in response to whoever wrote what you posted.
 
that is old testament law, and is clearly not what christians believe. the old testament is included in the bibal fpr historical purposes, and for prophecies, not so that we have to adhere to old hebrew customs.
 
Suffice it to say that there remains significant disagreement among prominent religious scholars regarding the correct interpretation of passages commonly held to denounce homosexuality. Granted, the majority view is well documented, and you could charge a lot of the dissenters with having been corrupted by those liberal institutions we all know as "higher learning centres"... but they have a solid argument.

Not that we should be treating ANY ancient tome as if it were the Criminal Code... or even a reliable ethical compass. There are some good values to be gleaned from bible study. But scripture does not equal morality, despite what those who thump the good book like to believe.
 
as far as letter f) goes check out........Mark 7:14-20

"Are you so dull? Don't you see that nothing that enters a man from the outside can make him unlean? For it doesn't go into his hear but into his stomach, and then out of his body. In saying this Jesus declared all foods clean"
 
I am not someone who reads out bible verses and all that stuff, but that letter is completely ridiculous. Those laws were basically part of that culture at the time. They don't apply to us today. Nobody, especially Christians, follow them. Most of the old testament is not taken litterally, just symbollically. The points that that letters makes are moot.

And, the bible being full of hate and murderous, I'm sorry but have you even read the bible. read the beatitudes or pretty much anything in the new testament, and you will find it is more abotu loving your enemies than killing, slavery, and hate.
 
and your post says so much more than mine did. let's all kiss and make up so we can enjoy a funny letter, be it fictional or not. and yes, i am brilliant thank you very much.
 
as someone who was raised in a religious family and sent to school run by a church, i had always seen the bible as something to not read literally but figuritively. that is the major difference between people who fully comprehend the ideas in that book and people who think everything written there should be copied word for word
 
if these passages have nothing to do with our current society because they are from the old testiment, than there is no reason to believe that gays are evil and be sent to hell because it says so in the old testiment
 
well paul, the argument exists because homosexuality is frowned upon in the new testament as well.
 
but is everything in the bible always taken literally, think about what you would be able to do, or not do if you followed everything that the bible says
 
as i mentionned in the atheist thread...my only issue with religious literature is verses that contain this:

"Obey me, and I will be your God and you will be my people. Walk in all the ways I command you, that it may go well with you" -jeremiah 7:23.

anything of the sort disturbs me.

it is unfortunate that homosexuality is frowned upon because of traditional beliefs that stem as far back as these old pieces of religious literature.

but every religion must update itself as often as possible. such as when the mormons began to excommunicate all members of their church who began practicing polygamy because the supreme court ruled polygamy was not protected under their constitution. simply put, religious beliefs are always protected, but their practices are not.

this was quite possibly one of the few good decisions state congress and us supreme court made.

seperating religion from morality as per legal acceptance is something i believe to be important.

which is why i support gay marriage and support gays period.
 
took me a long time to come to this view but people should be able to do whatever makes them happy as long as it doesn't hurt others, period.
 
haha thats some shit. really funny when you think about it, they actually used to do shit like that to people. Before mankind developed their "politics" further, and got us where we were today.
 
you must be in grade 2 if it took you a long time to read that. no offence or anything but there are many much longer pieces of writing.
 
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