Death by puking.

PagesHouse

PagesHouse

Active member
Pretty sure death by puking will be the result of my night. I was poisoned by food this morning in combination with getting excessively drunk last night and can't even keep liquids in my stomach. The only thing that was successfully digested was one orange popsicle today at approximately 3:30pm.
My blood sugar is so low that I fainted today, but I CANNOT EAT.... or really move around at all.

Moral of the story is..... I need some laughs. Prreeeeeese help meh smile?
 
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You're so right! I've been slacking..... I'll do that now!

OH and this thread might've been a really bad idea because I just found out laughing makes me feel like I need to puke.
 
3:07 of your shake weight video
i love the way she sticks her tongue out and says "GLAD YOURE BACK" ....shakeshakeshakeshake
 
eat some ritz crackers or saltines. put them in your mouth in small bites and chew the fuck out of the tiny bite until it's basically just paste that you can swallow. eat in serious moderation for a little while and if it gets better eat some more crackers and drink some gatorade. once crackers and gatorade go down okay try to eat some ramen noodles
 
Trust me I've tried everything : / and in very tiny small slow bites..... I can get it down but once it hits my stomach it comes right back up. Even liquids other than water.... ginger ale and OJ were huge failures.
 
Yeah I remember some bad nights, felt bad and couldn't eat untill like 5-6pm the day after, just wait drink a bit of water just to keep you hydrated but realy no that much or you'll puke it. oh yeah and man^
 
So I was in a public restroom at the mall yesterday. I saw a guy's feet in a stall when I walked in...and there was a very stinky smell, so I assumed he was taking a major dump. So I got real quiet for a little bit and let everything settle down. You could hear a faint grunting sound and the ever so slightly "kerplunk" of a turd dropping from the anus. Other that this guys shut you could hear a pin drop.

Then I let out a war cry as loud as possible and threw myself against the stall door as hard as I could, causing a loud bang. I bet that guy hasn't been that scared in this life because he yelled in a very surprised fashion and said, "WHAT THE FoCK!" really loud, and stated to try to stand up. I could hear him fumbling with his pants because his belt buckle was making noise.

I was long gone before he made it out of the stall though.
 
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I know it sounds fucking stupid and like a typical NS response but...

Have you tried smoking maybe a leeeetle bit of green? Not too long ago I came home from school and was barfing a shit ton, and that night I felt sick so I lit up a bowl and did not feel like I had to puke at all. That was the first time I had ever used weed for anything medically related.

It worked wonders.
 
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BHAAAA

that reminds me of one time up at timber line i was taking a shit and a guy came in and in the stall next to mine he ran in. and started taking a power shit. like. soo loud and smelly and hes grunting and saying things in German. and hes flushing whilst shiting... and i just burst out in laugher.. and he is shiting like no tomrow.. man....fun times.
 
I smoke everyday so yes.... I kept up with my normal routine. Helps stop the actual act of puking for sure but I still have the constant feeling in my stomach.

p.s. thanks for the laughs brothas : )
 
OH and one thing I didn't mention last night because I couldn't think about food....

I've been a vegetarian for awhile. I love bacon. The ONE TIME I decide to get bacon on my egg & cheese breakfast sandwich yesterday morning and BAM food poisoning. I'm so sad that bacon is now ruined for me : ( So so so so so sad.
 
Yes, but my vegetarianism has kind of been withering away in the past few months.... I've eaten turkey that my friends shot and a little bit of chicken and was absolutely fine. This was definitely something contaminated.
 
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it was a bad egg... that would be my guess.. or you got nasty bug. just a conencadence

never give up the bacon.
 
I actually just talked to someone who said it couldn't have been the bacon because bacon is cured or something. It was either a bad egg or it was contaminated with something else (like it touched raw chicken or something). I also know there were issues with bad eggs a couple months ago so I'll blame the eggs, but you know when you get really sick after eating something how it kind of just ruins it for you? It's so sad.
 
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