Best Movie Quotes

Clint: You said, "Someone's tokin' some reefer."

Mike: No, I meant somewhere I smell some pot, you know? It was just an observation.

Clint: Oh, an observation, huh? Well who the hell are you, man? Isaac fucking Newton?

dazed and confused
 
ok this one sweeps them all away

the greatest trick the devil ever played was convince the world he didnt exist

usual suspects
 
"Thanks pickle-fucker!"

-Jay

Half of what's his jiggers lines form that movie are hilariious too. The guy who talks about Pillowpants, his girlfriends pussy troll

 
Sean Smith: Beer and pussy. That's all I need.

Ronald Fisher: We gotta find ourselves a Smurfette.

Sean Smith: Smurfette?

Ronald Fisher: Yeah, not some tight-ass Middlesex chick, right? Like this cute little blonde that will get down and dirty with the guys. Like Smurfette does.

Donnie: Smurfette doesn't fuck.

Ronald Fisher: That's bullshit. Smurfette fucks all the other Smurfs. Why do you think Papa Smurf made her? Because all the other Smurfs were getting too horny.

Sean Smith: No, no, no, not Vanity. I heard he was a homosexual.

Ronald Fisher: Okay, then, you know what? She fucks them and Vanity watches. Okay?

Sean Smith: What about Papa Smurf? I mean, he must get in on all the action.

Ronald Fisher: Yeah, what he does, he films the gang-bang, and he beats off to the tape.
 
alright im going all out donnie darko - well the funny ones

Kitty Farmer: [Tearfully to Rose Darko] Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.

Donnie: I made a new friend today.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Real or imaginary?

Donnie: Imaginary.

Kitty Farmer: "No duh" is a product of fear.

Donnie: You are such a fuckass.

Elizabeth: Did you just call me a fuckass? You can go suck a fuck.

Donnie: Oh, please, tell me Elizabeth, how exactly does one suck a fuck?

Kitty Farmer: Not only am I a teacher, but I am also the mother of a Middlesex child. Therefore, I am the only person here who transcends the parent-teacher bridge.

Cherita Chen: Chut up.

Kitty Farmer: Okay, now girls... I want you to concentrate. Failure is not an option. And Bethany, if you feel the need to vomit up there... just swallow it.

Donnie: My parents didn't get me what I wanted for Christmas.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: What did you want?

Donnie: Hungry Hungry Hippos.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: And how did you feel, being denied these hungry, hungry hippos?

Donnie: Regret.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Do you still think about girls a lot?

Donnie: [Under hypnosis] Yeah.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: How are things going at school?

Donnie: I think about girls a lot.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: I asked you about school, Donnie.

Donnie: I think about fucking a lot, in school.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: What else do you think about, when you're at school?

Donnie: Married With Children.

Dr. Lilian Thurman: Do you think about your family?

Donnie: I just turn down the volume and think about fucking

Dr. Lilian Thurman: I asked you about your family.

Donnie: [Chuckling] No, I don't think about fucking my family, that's gross.

 
There was me, that is Alex, and my three droogs, that is Pete, Georgie, and Dim, and we sat in the Korova Milkbar trying to make up our rassoodocks what to do with the evening.
 
sorry this isnt in a movie but its a great quote

I'm doin good, I'm doin good...I'm doin so good DAT BITCH I

FOLLOWED YOU TODAY!!!

(What nigga? Is you crazy? What you mean you followed me?!)

Yeah, nah dont gon stutterin now de-de-de-de-de yo ass, gon and

sit down (What is wrong which you?)

Yeah I followed you today... (You aint follow nobody.)

You had just came out the chicken place, you gat you a 6-piece

wing wit a greenbean and yam,

bitch i seen what you had ordered (nigga you aint see shit.)

You had dat ol monkey ass nigga wit you (You the only monkey ass

nigga I know!)

This nigga had baby powder on his chest wit a whole bunch of lil

kinked up necklaces and shit wit

"I love you mom and dad" and fake uzis and shit

connected to the chain (You talkin bout yoself ol extra regular

ass nigga.)

Now see my first reaction was to run up on you and just grab the

back of yo pants and give you a wedgie

(Oh but you know, you know better though) Just

put the thong all up in ya ass (Don't touch nobody...Dont touch

me)

But I said naw, bitch i said naw

(Dont wanna be dealin wit yo ass, you need to stop talkin to me

crazy faggot!)

And then had the nerve, you had the nerve to go get yo hair cut

down low like a nigga...

Bitch yo head look like a dirty tennis ball now
 
why dont you tell the girl you love her with all of your heart, and if you dont see her tomorrow your going to die.

Now just imagine an Italian accent and thats the godfather
 
"Now you can go see where Churchill took a tom or whatever it is you Yanks do in London"

"Here's your famous GSE"

"Don't act like you not impressed."

"Dodge this"

"Hallo...My name is Inigo Montoya...you killed my father...prepare to die"

"You ever heard of Aristotle, Plato, Socrates....morons?"

"Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, fuck you" (something like that)
 
i probably fucked this quote up, but im going to give a shot at it

"I love...carpet, I love...desk"

"Are you just looking around the room and saying whatever you see?"

"I love...lamp, I love lamp!"
 


Bullet Tooth Tony: So, you are obviously the big dick. The men on the side of ya are your balls. There are two types of balls. There are big brave balls, and there are little mincey faggot balls.

Vinny: These are your last words, so make them a prayer.

Bullet Tooth Tony: Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two small mincey faggot balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties mangled up. There's no pussy here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your gun, And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O, " Should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... Fuck off
 
got it

Heloo, my name is Shane Mckonkey. I was born in Vancouver Canada, thats aboot three hours north of, ah, seattle.

Right now were here in Bella Coola Canada, and ah, weve been shut in by the weather for like three weeks eh. We havn't shot fuck all. Ooh, Soory.

We've just been sittng around, eating pasta, and spending loonies and toonies on Kokanee and peelers.

But, as soon as this weather clears, im gunna pull on my toque, eat some canadian bacon, and ah, im keen to giver.

from year book

or "its anchorman not anchorlady and that is a scientific fact"

from anchorman
 
yes, you better watch it, cause just when i thought you couldnt get any stupider you go and do something like this.... AND TOTALLY REDEEM YOURSELF
 
Cock. Hey, Skidmark Steve, cool. You sill hangin' out, playin' Nintendo?

I'm telling you, it's jobs. We gotta get jobs. Then we get the khakis. Then we get the chicks
 
"pull over"

"no, its a cardigan, but thanks for asking!'

"PULL OVER"

- dumb & dumber

"and then that no talent ass clown came along, why should i change my name, im not the one who sucks?!"

- office space

 
you said that twice, but its so funny when the one guy does an impression of jp and then when jp talks to the its so spot on "yo just copped a benz gonna go down to the beach maybe get some barrels."

and oh yeah he goes "here at forum we only use bottled water on our rails"

 
You smell that? Do you smell that? Napalm, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning. You know, one time we had a hill bombed, for twelve hours. When it was all over I walked up. We didn't find one of 'em, not one stinkin' dink body. The smell, you know that gasoline smell, the whole hill. Smelled like … victory. - Kilgore

You never had a rope around your neck. Well, I'm going to tell you something. When that rope starts to pull tight, you can feel the Devil bite your ass. - Tuco

Drill Sergeant: Gump! What's your sole purpose in this army?

Forrest Gump: To do whatever you tell me, drill sergeant!

Drill Sergeant: God damn it, Gump! You're a goddamned genius! This is the most outstanding answer I have ever heard. You must have a goddamn I.Q. of 160. You are goddamned gifted, Private Gump.

I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya punk? -

As God is my witness, I'll always be hungry again. - Homer Simpson
 
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