Awesome Haiku's (contest)

[C.R.E.A.M]

So i have ran into a few very funny Haiku's the last couple of days, and knowing the creative hilariousness of the lovely NS community, i thought this would be a great thread. Especially if you can make them about skiing or babe's or whatever hilarious topics.

A good example was the Bloodninja one, someone find that it was hilarious, another was in the spiders thread, and i forget where the third one is.

if any of you forgot the pattern for a Haiku is

title

5

7

5

word

and if there are any really good ones ill send you some stickers or something, i just got a shit ton in the mail and i know you guys love them.

word! let the Haiku'ing begin!

 

[T-Holt]

I don't like haikus

Because then I have to count

Everything I say

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

A mourning

dove feeds

In a marijuana bush

And sings a high coo

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

hahaha a redneck haiku

PRIDE

Grinning, he displays

The nine hundred beer cans

Filling pickup bed

 

[T-Holt]

Haikus are easy

But sometimes they don't make sense

Refrigerator

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

HAHAHA YES!

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

Free beer tastes better

than the beer that you pay for.

Funny how that works

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

fail ill give this another go

BUMPPP!

 

[emopoppins]

this haiku is about my struggle being a black affluent male in a mostly downtrodden urban society.

Squad up muh Niggas

ya know wat ya up against

real talk, true story.

 

[Dainsey]

skiing it is life

without i am so like

dre without a light

 

[hellomynameisjef]

haikus are easy

but sometimes they dont make sense

refregirator

rhyming is for fags

said the crazy blind man guy

thats why i haiku

im going for it

one seven syllable word

tittycacapoopyass

 

[KLovelace]

the crusty hippie

swiftly hit the frying pan

and tumbled along

 

[Rainbow*Stylin]

music makes it fairwell, as fair as life can behatred dominates

 

[skithe49th]

alaska is coollots of snow and theres skiingak F T W

 

[skithe49th]

chads gap is the bestcan you get there from altaill just make a thread
pee pee in the bumdon my robe and wizards capNS F T W

 

[littlebski]

the dog then shakesas master sits on the liftyellow rain

have no idea if i did this right haha

 

[Tinga]

damn you took mine.

 

[KLovelace]

not a haiku.. it goes

5 sylables

7 syllables

5 again

example:

i ate a bab-y

free range organic only

that's how i like meat

(joke.. just tying this into the dead baby joke thread now)

 

[TZA.]

i love to pretzelI really wish i was black4 B I 9 chyea

 

[skifree919]

I just ate dinnerI farted and it smells badOops, that's disgusting

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

HAHAAH

first one is hilarious

harrr!

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

"chads gap is the best

can you get there from alta

ill just make a thread"

HAHAAH

hilarious

k+ to u sir

 

[Astomp]

i drank way to muchi dont remember the nighti did go hogging

 

[ax_murderer]

i'll have to pull out my sioux tribe haiku's later.

 

[Astomp]

i hope not to frightthat was truly all a lieall i did was drink
it was not too muchbut i was tipsy turvyredbull vodka mmmm.

 

[EastCoastPride]

the mountain is kind

but lunch can be expensive

when you are so baked.

 

[hellomynameisjef]

listen to this claim

i hung out with black people

one up ha ha word

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

the rules should be that

we can only talk using

hiaku's in this thread

 

[east_toast]

I am so dam white

when we play outside at night

I lose hide and seek

 

[Mr_W00]

so this is a limeric, but im still going to post it cuse its the best poem ive ever written

one day this guy stole my skis

but that moron he dropped his keys

so i grabed my crowbar

and went to his car

then completely bashed in his knees

 

[skithesprings]

Windows NT crashed.

I am the Blue Screen of Death.

No one hears your screams.

.

My mouth is oily.

I thought it would taste so good:

Cocoa butter. Mmmm.

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

u just failed epic

the rules now are that you must

say errrthanggg haikus

 

[mad_540_trix]

easily my favorite haiku ever.

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

sometimes i feel

like people dont understand

that they should read threads

 

[Alexander_Keith]

Endless march of days

Life goes on as time stands still

Guess I'll touch my balls

 

[spruitm]

my coat is all wet

because i walked in the rain

and it turns me on

 

[nickman]

I sit in my chairsurrounded my all my peers no one knows i poop'd

 

[nickman]

I sit in my chairSurrounded by all my peersno one knows i poopd

 

[C.R.E.A.M]

i need to get some

fucking boots, this is stupid

who is hording them?