Amazing "I got married" thread

OH MY GOD LOOK AT THAT FUCKING BEAST. looks like something you would fight in halo...they should use her as a model for the hunters in halo 4.
 
omg wow. a huge disfgiured balding man/woman with an aerodynamic forehead married to a stick. wtf
 
holy shi that is a guy no doubt i mean look at the last picture thats disguisting i am 98.45% posotive i would look better in a wedding dress and i like how the cake is made of freakn twinkies hahahaha
 
whats even funnier is that in the original post he says he kept his virginity till he got married, then several posts down he says shes preggers...so either he really managed to find his way through the blubber to the vag...or someone else did first...
 
shit, look at the bridesmaids too. They are all huge. The ceremony was outdoors because all of them couln't possibly fit in the same room to get ready for the wedding
 
shit that is the ugliest bitch i have ever seen... they have to call in search and rescue to get him out after sex
 
saw the oppurtunity

motivator4604502.jpg

 
how did he survive the army? looks like he would get pwn3d in boot camp let alone fighting, he must've been a computer guy
well no matter how fucked up that...that...thing is at least they're both happy, cliche but nice to know even the fucking worst of the absolute worst, bottom of the barrel, person(?) can be happy with someone
 
""How dare you talk about my wife like that, you are lucky I am in the military and am considered a deadly weapon or I would fight you in her honor. As for children we have one on the way now, which is why I married her. She is upset about losing her figure but I still think she looks great.""

woah just woah haha upset about her losing her figure hahaha

but im gonna say fake he claims he was a virgin till he married but right he says we got married cause we have a kid on the way
 
is that even a girl, like seriously, look at below and honestly tell me that thing has a pussy, (itd have tits regardless)

l_eb734d802ed9b59ac5fad9bd74faf873.jpg

 
I don't think I'll be able to get hard for at least a week after seeing those pics and reading that thread. Excuse me while I gargle with Listerine to get the taste of vomit out of my mouth.

But honestly. That was hilarious. Thank you for finding that even though I am now scarred.
 
I don't think I'll be able to get hard for at least a week after seeing

those pics and reading that thread. Excuse me while I gargle with

Listerine to get the taste of vomit out of my mouth.

^ hahahahahahahahah this just made it a whole lot better thanks man
 
The wild snorlax reappears.

Does it have eyes? I couldn't tell. I've seen cows skinnier than that.
 
Its weird how he said he waited till marriage to fuck but then he said that he married her cus shes preggos.... bs?
 
Call me Ishmael. Some years

ago - never mind how long precisely - having little or no money in my purse, and

nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a

little and see the watery part of the world.
 
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