Writing A Resignation Letter

ZachAndCheese

ZachAndCheese

Member
Worked for this sucky ass water park for like 3 weeks and got totally shafted by my boss and the management there. Most lifeguards have already quit and I plan on doing so tomorrow. Decided to keep it semi classy with a resignation letter. Any fun ideas for shit I should include in the letter?
 
13024177:ZachAndCheese said:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch. I'll have you know my name is John, and I woke up this morning 5:30 sharp to the smell of wet pussy. I was getting a blowjob from two bitches (Shit was SO Cash), one was trying to fit my humongous 3 pound balls in her mouth while the other was choking halfway on my 18 and 3\8 inch dick. She started to squirt hard, she was convulsing and having 6 orgasms at the same time. I gave it to them and they were on the floor squirting like motherfucking fountains. Must have come about a quart of sperm and compressed air. Imagine your best orgasm, then multiply it by 35. I had to go to base camp so I front-flipped from my 14th floor barracks into my valet parked 2012 Ferrari (I got connexions). Pushed my shit to about 4 hundo (mph, mind you) and I was at base camp in no time. When I entered, I became a top sniper and was granted access to the entire arsenal of the USMC. I learned how to kill someone in over 700 different ways and was assigned to be the leader of a squad that will kill 300 terrorists using gorilla warfare tactics. Also did 6000 push-ups, 8000 sit-ups and bench-pressed 30 plates in 16 minutes. After basic training, I met a network of secret spies who will help me trace your IP address, while eating gold plated sushi and 15,000 $ champagne. My unit got the rest of the day off and I became captain of our base's football team and starter of the basketball team. I got straight A's on the military entrance exams and received more awards. Meanwhile, you were jacking off to pictures on Facebook and naked drawn Japanese people. Went back in the Lambo to my barracks and now I am getting ready to go to sleep. I am going to graduate at the top of my class in the Navy Seals tomorrow and I want to look pretty much perfect for it. Don't be a stranger and remember, I did more in one day than you will your entire life.
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never seen this before...
 
13024281:Holte said:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my lifeguarding class, and I've been involved in numerous shark rescues, and I have done over 300 CPR demonstrations. I am trained in backstroke and I'm the fastest swimmer in the fucking waterpark. You are nothing to me but just another obnoxious middle schooler. I will push you into the shallow end and break your neck, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with running by the pool? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am adding extra chlorine to the water, maggot. Your swimsuit is bleached so white it burns. You're gonna drown, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can blow my whistle at you at over seven hundred decibels, without even leaving the guard stand. Not only am I extensively trained in whistle blowing, but I have access to the entire textbooks of the Red Cross and I will use them to their full extent to kick your miserable ass out of the park, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will whistle the fuck out of you and you will drown. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
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I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
 
Just did it. Was paid $10 dollars by a friend to spell out fuck you down the side of the letter. They did not notice when I first gave it to them.
 
13024281:Holte said:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my lifeguarding class, and I've been involved in numerous shark rescues, and I have done over 300 CPR demonstrations. I am trained in backstroke and I'm the fastest swimmer in the fucking waterpark. You are nothing to me but just another obnoxious middle schooler. I will push you into the shallow end and break your neck, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with running by the pool? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am adding extra chlorine to the water, maggot. Your swimsuit is bleached so white it burns. You're gonna drown, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can blow my whistle at you at over seven hundred decibels, without even leaving the guard stand. Not only am I extensively trained in whistle blowing, but I have access to the entire textbooks of the Red Cross and I will use them to their full extent to kick your miserable ass out of the park, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will whistle the fuck out of you and you will drown. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
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Every time I see this I crack the FUCK UP
 
13025683:ZachAndCheese said:
Just did it. Was paid $10 dollars by a friend to spell out fuck you down the side of the letter. They did not notice when I first gave it to them.
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Need a copy of the letter
 
You worked at a water park. It's not classy. Should have just collected your last check and said I'm done.
 
13025683:ZachAndCheese said:
Just did it. Was paid $10 dollars by a friend to spell out fuck you down the side of the letter. They did not notice when I first gave it to them.
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Lol I did this on my science final senior year. Made is say "Science is Stupid" down the margin all the while maintaining an A quality essay. Also did a Newschoolers one on another final but both pics were on my old phone that died.
 
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