What is the craziest thing you've woken up to after a night of partying?
- Thread starter JordanButtfart
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GayWolf420
Active member
shocker611
Active member
One of the first time I ever drank I was on hs senior trip in Florida. Woke up in the morning butt naked in the bathtub with my soaked shorts (complete with ruined phone and about a pound of sand inside) sitting next to me and the shower on pelting me in the chest. I also had ridiculously beat up shins that I still have scars from. Later found out that I was running up and down the beach naked yelling "I'm a hundred meter RUNNERRRR" and was taking the surf breakers (the big concrete wall things?) straight to my shins over and over eating shit laughing the entire time. I guess my friends spent like 15 minutes just watching me make a fool of myself and some people came down from their rooms above us and were just standing on the beach watching me run around like a dumbass. Finally they carried me back inside and just dumped me in the bathtub. Still can't figure out why they turned the shower on though.
Surprised I don't have more than that considering the great deal of shenanigans, but I'm generally pretty bed driven once I get to a certain point
Surprised I don't have more than that considering the great deal of shenanigans, but I'm generally pretty bed driven once I get to a certain point
WaffleMaster
Member
*open my eyes**I'm in a room full of people sleeping*
*roll over*
*black guy staring at my from about 10 feet away*
*fell back asleep*
*woke up to him kicking my ass*
*roll over*
*black guy staring at my from about 10 feet away*
*fell back asleep*
*woke up to him kicking my ass*
thenightman
Member
6 cook crawfish in my pockets and about a dozen others scattered throughout my house, not a single one was consumed.
I honestly don't know a restaurant within 50 miles of me that sells crawfish.
I honestly don't know a restaurant within 50 miles of me that sells crawfish.
OGHolliday
Active member
threads for when I have some time
ggfski42
Member
After a party, woke up laying on top of a shipping container behind a Target store. Looked over and there was a perfect human size hole in the privacy fence a few yards away. I don't know what happened but clearly i got lost walking home, plowed through the fence, and climbed into bed on top of the container. Also their was a camera pointed directly at me a few feet away, so whoever got to watch that tape got a good laugh im sure.
Chunter
Active member
I was downtown a couple miles from my house drinking at the bars when (I think) my friends decided to leave me, or maybe I lost them; not too sure. But anyways I woke up the next day maybe a mile from my house inside the cab of a old truck that was unlocked and parked in front of someones house. I somehow found a roll of carpet and used that as a blanket.
swoger
Member
went to this party at my friends and I had my sleeping bag, pillow, and toiletries with me but we started drinking some beer, i probably pounded down like 2 or 3, and ended up waking up on the floor. woke up and realized i didn't use my sleeping bag and forgot to brush my teeth before i went to bed
iSmokeweed
Active member
Either waking up in the Newark Penn station( I live in DC) or after a night of mixing psychedelics I had been sleeping in a mixture of glow in dark ceiling stars and various slices of pizza
ChadThundercock
Active member
I woke up in a new bugatti one time.
fupaface
Member
-came to out of a 3 day xanax and liquor fueled black out, there was shattered glass all over my house, towels and shit that had caught fire and some how gone out, 500 or so whip its all over the kitchen and the hallway. To top it all of my leg was all fucked up, couldnt even walk on it
-Came to after another xanax and liquor blackout, in someone else's house, cops had there guns drawn on me and I was yelling at them to get the fuck out of my house, that was also the last time I drank or used drugs.
-Came to after another xanax and liquor blackout, in someone else's house, cops had there guns drawn on me and I was yelling at them to get the fuck out of my house, that was also the last time I drank or used drugs.
Turd.Ferguson
Active member
12866247:swoger said:
2-3 beers man! wow where can i get a genetic tolerance of alcohol like you man!!!!!!!!
10/10 would read again
Woke up in a rental unit where many people were staying with blood all over the white sheets next to a good looking fellow. His friends were just sitting on the couch next to the pull out waiting for us to wake up.
It had been -30 degrees the night before and we poached a hot tub. I tore off a giant piece of skin off my shin when it froze to a metal railing. This is what caused the bleeding.
It was really awkward explaining that one.
It had been -30 degrees the night before and we poached a hot tub. I tore off a giant piece of skin off my shin when it froze to a metal railing. This is what caused the bleeding.
It was really awkward explaining that one.
Sno.
Active member
Woke up the morning after my 21st birthday after going out the night before to pioneer square and found myself in a hotel room. I found my best friend naked and passed out in the bathtub surrounded by slices of pizza and one stuck to the shower wall. When we went to leave the hotel there was throw up in the elevator and I'm thinking it had something to do with a hotel party in "my room" based on the condition of the room.
Toaster-Tony
Active member
Blackout me tried making scrambled eggs one night after bar close. Apparently I lit the stove and then proceeded to crack an egg onto the open flame. It appeared that I then tried to stir the egg around the drip pan with a wooden spoon before it all lit on fire. By the time the whole ordeal was done, the kitchen looked like a former meth lab.
Anyways, I woke up to very angry roommates.
Anyways, I woke up to very angry roommates.
AT-AT
Active member
Freshman year Halloween. I woke up on my floor, in my dorm, in my boxers, using my vomit soaked backpack as a pillow.
Not that bad, until I remembered that i had went out dressed up as a Hawaiian, and was wearing swim shorts and no boxers, and my swim shorts were no where to be found. I finally found them, along with my grass skirt and lays, in my friends bathroom. His room is 5 floors below mine.
None of my friends could fill me in. They said they had lost me after I yacked in a mcds urinal.
Not that bad, until I remembered that i had went out dressed up as a Hawaiian, and was wearing swim shorts and no boxers, and my swim shorts were no where to be found. I finally found them, along with my grass skirt and lays, in my friends bathroom. His room is 5 floors below mine.
None of my friends could fill me in. They said they had lost me after I yacked in a mcds urinal.
Well my housemates and I decided to get 20 half gallons and invite as many people over to our house... We ran out of alcohol and everyone was fucked. Eventually the police showed up and shut down the party but it was about time and they were chillin considering 60+ people were in my house.
In the morning I wake up and there were 20 phone books ripped to absolute shit. One window was busted out, along with a fat ass mirror that came with the house. There must have been at around a gram of coke in my rug from some stupid girl that spilled all her coke in my rug, and people tried to snort my rug(while the party was happening). My couches were crooked, the Xbox360 was smashed along with tons of games, the floors were fucked and on the ground of the restroom was a condom that seemed to be partially used. There were earrings in the shower and we all think some dude faked putting on the condom and fucked a chick in the shower and did her dirty. That bathroom was so nasty after that night. Good thing that situation is long gone and that bathroom had a couple big deep cleaning along with the entire house.
In the morning I wake up and there were 20 phone books ripped to absolute shit. One window was busted out, along with a fat ass mirror that came with the house. There must have been at around a gram of coke in my rug from some stupid girl that spilled all her coke in my rug, and people tried to snort my rug(while the party was happening). My couches were crooked, the Xbox360 was smashed along with tons of games, the floors were fucked and on the ground of the restroom was a condom that seemed to be partially used. There were earrings in the shower and we all think some dude faked putting on the condom and fucked a chick in the shower and did her dirty. That bathroom was so nasty after that night. Good thing that situation is long gone and that bathroom had a couple big deep cleaning along with the entire house.
Calb3rt
Active member
wake up to people pounding on my door, open my eyes to a perfectly bloody handprint on the wall inches from my face. still kind of drunk, dont open door, they leave. realize i am in my dorm room, which is covered in blood, and not at my friends house 10 miles away where i should have been. I opened my door to see one long continuous horizontal blood streak all the way down the hall to the bathroom. take a shower and discover the source of the blood was my own hand and without thinking i started to wash it but was drunkenly confused as to why there was chunks of random crap that i could pull off until i yanked on one that was still attached and i felt my pinky twitch. i had managed to cut from the inside base of my pinky all the way up to the outside of my fingernail and had been removing flesh. stuffed the remaining threads back in the cut went back to my room to find it being searched by 5 police, RA's and the RD. They genuinely thought that i had been shot and died in my room. i told them i would clean up the hall and they said i had bled on all 7 floors of the dorm and in both of the elevators so i had a lot of work ahead of me unless i wanted to pay for the hazmat cleanup. drunk bleeding me was hilarious to follow the next day because i was using my bloody hand to brace myself as i tried to walk which resulted in the long horizontal streaks of blood down most all of the halls. i lived on the 5th floor and had no idea how i even got back to the dorms or cut myself so badly. all of my friends were still at the house when i called them. although double headed beer bongs seem like the perfect way to do jager bombs, they are not.
Toaster-Tony
Active member
Ok, I wasn't sure if I should tell it or not, but since some of the other ones are pretty damn funny, here we go.
It was homecoming 2013, and I had been drinking for the better half of the day. Things started off great, we were on the boat and left in time to make the Wookiefoot concert before heading to venue for the night. Every homecoming, the fraternity puts on a festival-like party in the middle of the woods with christmas lights and bar in a few acre clearing. Anyways, I downed the better half of 1.75 of rum and remember nothing.
From what my friends recalled happening when they finally found me, I was standing on the roof of my Honda Accord screaming, "I just won the race!", as I popped a bottle of champagne (no idea where I got this) and tried backflipping off my car like they do in NASCAR. My friends said that I kinda got it around but landed really funny on my leg.
I woke up in the back seat of my car in an open field with no clothes on, no wallet, keys or phone, and a broken ankle. I spent the next hour or so hobbling around naked asking strangers who had camped out if they had seen any of my things. I later found all my clothes and belongings scattered through the bar area where the fraternity had been cleaning up the wreckage.
I'll never forget the looks on those people's faces when I was asking them where my stuff was..
It was homecoming 2013, and I had been drinking for the better half of the day. Things started off great, we were on the boat and left in time to make the Wookiefoot concert before heading to venue for the night. Every homecoming, the fraternity puts on a festival-like party in the middle of the woods with christmas lights and bar in a few acre clearing. Anyways, I downed the better half of 1.75 of rum and remember nothing.
From what my friends recalled happening when they finally found me, I was standing on the roof of my Honda Accord screaming, "I just won the race!", as I popped a bottle of champagne (no idea where I got this) and tried backflipping off my car like they do in NASCAR. My friends said that I kinda got it around but landed really funny on my leg.
I woke up in the back seat of my car in an open field with no clothes on, no wallet, keys or phone, and a broken ankle. I spent the next hour or so hobbling around naked asking strangers who had camped out if they had seen any of my things. I later found all my clothes and belongings scattered through the bar area where the fraternity had been cleaning up the wreckage.
I'll never forget the looks on those people's faces when I was asking them where my stuff was..
New years 2012 my boy had a party in Boston as his house...around 50-60 people so everyone kinda knew each other and everyone was just raging hard. Did a whole bunch of coke crushed a ton of alcahol...blacked out and passed out inside of a mattress box spring which was turned over so no one knew where I was. Long story short some kid stepped on the box spring fell through...the wood stabbed my back and I was bleeding everywhere and real pissed. No idea how I got inside of that box spring...but its hilarious to think about now.
Sno.
Active member
One time I went on an "all girls" bachelorette party trip to Oktoberfest in Leavenworth. I didn't want to go, because this group of girls is so catty and stupid all the time, but I was invited, so I went.
We were all staying in this huge cabin, which was fun and when we got there we partied and played stupid ass bachelorette party games until bed--then the next day had a party bus take us into Oktoberfest. We were all supposed to dress head-to-toe in a single color-- just a stupid little tidbit to the story.
Anyway, they were acting stupid at the event, and I ran into several other groups of my friends, so I was both hanging with the bachelorette party and visiting with other friends. The girls in the bachelorette group got upset that I had friends outside of the rainbow circle so they started getting bitchy. whatever.
I went to the bathroom with one of my girlfriends and when I came back the bachelorette party had left me. just gone. I was pissed, but whatever, just hung with my other groups of friends thinking they'd come back. They didn't. I spent the next 2 hours tracking them down OUTSIDE of the event at a bar down the street. I got there, they were being bitchy again, so I left. I found some random people to hang out with and went bar hopping with them. Then I went with this bf/gf back to his mom's house--which ended up being a cabin way up in the woods. He was super embarrassed about his hippy mom. He thought her rustic cabin and her hippy/granola house/attire was embarrassing but I hit it off with her. We talked basically all night, and she gave me a bunch of jars of homemade apple sauce.
With the business card of our party bus driver in my pocket, I called him and he came and picked me up! (leavenworth- small town)...we smoked weed together on the bus on the way back to the cabin and he dropped me off. That was weird. The next morning all of the girls were complete shocked to see me in my bed..."how the hell did she get back!?"...with three jars of homemade apple sauce on my bedside table.
We were all staying in this huge cabin, which was fun and when we got there we partied and played stupid ass bachelorette party games until bed--then the next day had a party bus take us into Oktoberfest. We were all supposed to dress head-to-toe in a single color-- just a stupid little tidbit to the story.
Anyway, they were acting stupid at the event, and I ran into several other groups of my friends, so I was both hanging with the bachelorette party and visiting with other friends. The girls in the bachelorette group got upset that I had friends outside of the rainbow circle so they started getting bitchy. whatever.
I went to the bathroom with one of my girlfriends and when I came back the bachelorette party had left me. just gone. I was pissed, but whatever, just hung with my other groups of friends thinking they'd come back. They didn't. I spent the next 2 hours tracking them down OUTSIDE of the event at a bar down the street. I got there, they were being bitchy again, so I left. I found some random people to hang out with and went bar hopping with them. Then I went with this bf/gf back to his mom's house--which ended up being a cabin way up in the woods. He was super embarrassed about his hippy mom. He thought her rustic cabin and her hippy/granola house/attire was embarrassing but I hit it off with her. We talked basically all night, and she gave me a bunch of jars of homemade apple sauce.
With the business card of our party bus driver in my pocket, I called him and he came and picked me up! (leavenworth- small town)...we smoked weed together on the bus on the way back to the cabin and he dropped me off. That was weird. The next morning all of the girls were complete shocked to see me in my bed..."how the hell did she get back!?"...with three jars of homemade apple sauce on my bedside table.
Blake.P
Active member
i was visiting my cousin at college while i was still in high school. blacked out the night before i was leaving but somehow everything went fine, and all looked normal, except i couldnt find my shirt. walked in to his neighbors room where we were for a while the night before, which still had the black light on, and holy shit i was absolutely covered in writing in high lighter. went to the airport and when tsa checked my id with the blacklight, they accidently flashed it on my hand, which was clearly covered. got a weird look from the tsa