Suspended for pressed ham

Mattsaff

Mattsaff

Member
so were coming home from a sailing meet on the bus, and me and my friend think it'd be funny to press ham on the window on the highway (our bus says the name of our school on the side)

this little silver car came up next to us and whips out his iphone and takes a picture of our asses, and then proceeds to drive in front of our bus all the way to the school. Me and my friend get off the bus as soon as possible because we know this guy has a pic of our asses and don't want to be there to confront him about it. So I'm all good till first period the next day, where I got pulled out of class by the dean, and he tells me he has a picture of my friend and i's "bare asses being pressed against the window" (almost asked for a copy of the picture because that would be epic) so ya now we have 2 days in school suspension all for some pressed ham. Turns out the guy who took the picture is an alumni of my school, which makes me wonder why the fuck he would go out of his way to fuck over a couple high school kids. well shit

sparknotes: pressed ham and a stranger took a pic.
 
Fuck the haters. A well timed and executed pressed ham is awesome. Can't believe this guy followed you all the way back to school and made a scene. He needs a hobby. There are so many other hilarious things he could have done with that photo, that wouldn't have gotten you suspended.
 
13001343:Mr.Huck said:
Fuck the haters. A well timed and executed pressed ham is awesome. Can't believe this guy followed you all the way back to school and made a scene. He needs a hobby. There are so many other hilarious things he could have done with that photo, that wouldn't have gotten you suspended.
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thank you. the reactions we were getting were priceless...until this asshole showed up. definitely that kid in high school that everyone hated and he's tryna back at the school. what a pussy
 
13001343:Mr.Huck said:
Fuck the haters. A well timed and executed pressed ham is awesome. Can't believe this guy followed you all the way back to school and made a scene. He needs a hobby. There are so many other hilarious things he could have done with that photo, that wouldn't have gotten you suspended.
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Seriously. It's one thing to press some ham but if you really want to have fun it' all about pressing dat sausage.
 
13001319:Mr.Sloth said:
Where do I go to get my 2 minutes and 100 IQ points back that I just lost?
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If it took you that long to read that then you probably don't need those IQ points anyways
 
13001343:Mr.Huck said:
Fuck the haters. A well timed and executed pressed ham is awesome. Can't believe this guy followed you all the way back to school and made a scene. He needs a hobby. There are so many other hilarious things he could have done with that photo, that wouldn't have gotten you suspended.
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Skiierman finally found a new hobby
 
13001347:Mattsaff said:
thank you. the reactions we were getting were priceless...until this asshole showed up. definitely that kid in high school that everyone hated and he's tryna back at the school. what a pussy
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Political correctness has gone way too far. In high school we were in Durango for a race. We bet one of our buddies that he wouldn't walk into the dairy queen wearing nothing but Tighty Whities and Sorrels and order an ice cream cone. He did it. Cost us $10. It was such an epic win. The place was packed and he just strolls up to the counter like a boss and orders a soft serve. It was like one of those scenes from an old western when the guy walks into a saloon and all conversations stops.

Point is that if someone tried this today, he'd wake up in jail. That sucks.
 
13001574:Mr.Huck said:
Political correctness has gone way too far. In high school we were in Durango for a race. We bet one of our buddies that he wouldn't walk into the dairy queen wearing nothing but Tighty Whities and Sorrels and order an ice cream cone. He did it. Cost us $10. It was such an epic win. The place was packed and he just strolls up to the counter like a boss and orders a soft serve. It was like one of those scenes from an old western when the guy walks into a saloon and all conversations stops.

Point is that if someone tried this today, he'd wake up in jail. That sucks.
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what makes me wonder is why he felt like he had go completely out of his way to fuck us over
 
13001574:Mr.Huck said:
Political correctness has gone way too far. In high school we were in Durango for a race. We bet one of our buddies that he wouldn't walk into the dairy queen wearing nothing but Tighty Whities and Sorrels and order an ice cream cone. He did it. Cost us $10. It was such an epic win. The place was packed and he just strolls up to the counter like a boss and orders a soft serve. It was like one of those scenes from an old western when the guy walks into a saloon and all conversations stops.

Point is that if someone tried this today, he'd wake up in jail. That sucks.
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PC needs to die in a fucking fire. Anything you say nowadays is either racist, sexist, prejudice, or some other kind of bullshit. The pussification of America is stronger than ever and this thread is just another example of it. Pisses me right the fuck off.
 
13001574:Mr.Huck said:
We bet one of our buddies that he wouldn't walk into the dairy queen wearing nothing but Tighty Whities and Sorrels and order an ice cream cone.
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this just solidifies that Mr.Huck is the man
 
13001358:Granite_State said:
Seriously. It's one thing to press some ham but if you really want to have fun it' all about pressing dat sausage.
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FU.gif
 
13001596:Mattsaff said:
what makes me wonder is why he felt like he had go completely out of his way to fuck us over
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I'm sure he was just trying to get your names so he could later stalk you, and attempt to buttrape you both. You might want to consider titanium boxers for awhile.
 
Who else thought it was actual ham being pressed when they read the title, and not asscheek?
 
If I was the guy behind you, I wouldn't be offended. I'd laugh. Then I'd laugh harder after getting you suspended with the photo.

Haha suckers, clearly the guy in the car is a better shithead than you.

Your move
 
13001632:Mr.Huck said:
I'm sure he was just trying to get your names so he could later stalk you, and attempt to buttrape you both. You might want to consider titanium boxers for awhile.
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Better keep a butt plug in. You know... For safety.
 
13001347:Mattsaff said:
thank you. the reactions we were getting were priceless...until this asshole showed up. definitely that kid in high school that everyone hated and he's tryna back at the school. what a pussy
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Find out where he lives and slash his tires, tp his house and break his windows
 
I was very confused throughout that story if it was ham, or a butt cheek. I hate you for not making it super clear
 
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