Sexual Lymrics

nickman

nickman

Member
There once was a woman with a rack

So large it put stress on her back

She walked like a cripple

with her gigantic nipples

The woman with the enormous rack.

There once was a robber from France

Who hid all his Jewels in his pants

When asked to divulge

the source of his bulge

he said "something you couldn't afford."

Im talented eh?

Write your own or w/e
 
There once was a dude who skied

In his girlfriends butt he peed

She started to bellow

Her anus now yellow

And shes not his girlfriend no more.
 
There once was a lesbian from Nantucket.

Who finally said just fuck it.

She took to the street.

Like a dog in heat.

Just prowling for a girl to eat.

Ya know......ya I'm surprised I thought of that to lol. Mods delete if you have to haha.
 
there once was a joey named chad

whos chad was as big as his dads

he met a chad named joey

and it made him very sad
 
There once was a man named Dave

Who kept a dead whore in a cave

He said i have to admit

I'm a bit of a shit

But think of the money I save

There once was a man named Lee

Who slept with an ape in a tree

The results were so horrid

All dick and no forehead

Three balls and a purple goatee

There once was a girl named Jill

Who had a vagina of steel

You could give her a thrill

With a pneumatic drill

Or an offset emery wheel

There once was a bot named Astair

Who was banging his girl on the stair

The banister broke

He doubled his stroke

And finished her off in midair
 
there once was a man from nantucket

his dick was so big he could suck it

he said if his ear was a cunt he would fuck it
 
There once was a man from Peru

He fell asleep in a canoe

He had a dream about venus

and played with his penis

and woke up with a hand full of goo
 
there once was a man named scott vailwho was told by many he'd failed
but he tried the expert village free trialnow he's famous and won the king of style
he gave away his advanced skiing techniquesthat he had been perfecting for weeks
from spread eagles to skiing rails. he realized no one could compete with SVAIL
he later called up his friend Richard Mymricswho told him this has nothing to do with sexual lymrics
 
its actually

there once was a man from nantuckett

whose dick was so long he could suck it

he said with a grin

as it dripped from his chin

if my ear were a cunt i would fuck it
 
on that note...imagine if your dick was so long you could wear it as a belt. Ive always had this stupid thought that a girl would come up to rub it because it was such a nice belt. Then you would get a boner and it would whip out and slap her.
Just a thought...
 
Sarah was having no fun

Cause her guy couldn't get her to cum

So after he was gone

She pulled out her dong

Never again, will he get some

There once was a wizard

Who was snowed in from a blizzard

So he put on his hat

And logged in to chat

And proceeded to play with his lizard

 
There once was a hermit named dave

Who kept a dead whore in his cave

She smelled like shit

And was missing a tit

But think of the money he saved
 
there once was a stripper named davebecause dave was a man who had shavedhis genitals offbob puked and then coughedwhen bob knew with who he had laid.

There once was a fellow named Hopewho's dick was as long as a ropea girl tried to suck it,but choked, kicked the bucketbut he fucked her ass only to cope
 
Jimmy thought to himself, sweet

Cause he finally touched a teat

The girl wasn't amused

Told the cops she was abused

Now Jimmy doesn't think it was so neat

Damn I'm such a poet, and I didn't even know it.

 
Tim had a look of shock

As he peered down at his cock

it was covered in red

And so was the bed

So he wiped himself off with his sock

 
oops didn't mean to double post...
there once was a girl who could shredand brought many boys into her bed she'd hop right on topand tell them "don't stop!"then got on her knees and gave head

 
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