i hear you. i wanted to make a point but i didn't want to misunderstand, or make assumptions about, your position.
unless i am reading it wrong, it seems that you are OK with people spending money on ski gear/training/etc so long as they are purchasing it for themselves and not for someone else. so what exactly is wrong with a person who cares about another person buying them something (gear, lessons, etc.)? i don't think many people would turn down that sort of offer from a loved one. i personally worked all summer to save up for my new ski gear for each season but if my parents had been in a position to buy it for me, i definitely would not have said no (and i would have found something else to spend my money on).
additionally, i was a coach for several years after college and the only reason there were kids on the team at all was because of the willingness of their parents to pay the fee. none of the kids on the team were there because they, themselves, had saved up and paid for it. generally speaking, the sort of people who are eligible to be on ski teams (elementary, middle, and high school aged kids) are not providing for themselves, so it is only natural that their parents or family members are the ones paying for that stuff. if they hadn't, i wouldn't have had that job.
so it sort of seems like the best scenario for ALL parties.. parents take care of their kids, kids have a good life, other people have jobs as a result. am i missing something?