hey five o, are you going with your school, for like a grad trip thing?
-That gun made me feel like a man, now all that i have left are my enormous genitals.' black cop from the simpsons
-me:so whats your name dude?
some drunk: JESUS!!
me: oh really!??! so can you walk on water?
some drunk: no, but i can walk on kool-aid.