Is This Normal?

ScubaSteveFather

ScubaSteveFather

Member
I've been in college for a semester and started my second semester 2 weeks ago. I'm not a super skier but i'm not half bad either. (Like cork 9's etc shit) Anyway at the end of last semester I tore my acl, mcl, and meniscus (around december 8th). Since I've been dealing ok I guess. It just sucks not being able to do anything really physical and hard. I used to run around 5 miles every 2 days and sometimes go on super long runs 15ish miles. Funny story I ran home from Westminister to my apartment in Golden once but that's for another time. Anyway I have a awesome Girlfriend who pushes me to be better etc. Furthermore, I got a 4.0 last semester which ain't too bad. Lately and even for the past year ish (since i started cutting down on weed now I rarely smoke once a month max) I just haven't been able to find a point for my life. I mean ya great i can be an engineer and design shit or do anything really but whats the point. We all die at some point. Furthermore in the last 2 months my sleeping schedule has been getting weirder and weirder. I used to not sleep once in a while to party or have fun and sometimes do school work but rarely. Lately I sleep one night and stay up all night or sleep 1-2 hours the next night. Like WTF is wrong with me. I don't feel fulfilled. IDK maybe i'm just fucking crazy or neurotic or something. Furthermore I procrastinate like fucking crazy. Literally Ik what work i have to do and I tell my girlfriend that I'm doing it and all my roommates and shit and i sit down and just stare off into space or read or just do random shit. Right now I have 3 articles to write for my job (I'm a writer for the paper) 1 article to edit and 1 paper due for a class tomorrow to write. I'lll prob start doing that tomorrow around 5 or 6 am. Finally another thing is I lie a lot. Like even when i don't have to. Oh and I am super self-depreciating. For example, I always think the worst of myself. I sorta just realized that i'm not fully right in the head now so I'm thinking of going to see a counselor this week but I love how Newschoolers is super judgmental and just awesome that way so I thought I'd post and see wtf you guys have to say. IDK what my question is exactly I guess just respond to my message. Am I depressed, Neurotic, fine, crazy, i don't care just tell me something even if it's just terrible.
 
i've had similar problems. sounds like depression to me. you just have to keep working and you'll get through it
 
Don't wanna be rude or call you out, but how many times did you lie in your OP. Just be honest you don't have to say what you lied about just how many times if any. Even if you lie about the answer, you will know the true answer.
Sounds like you're a little depressed. It happens and lying is part of that. Even if it's a little lie say for example you lied about being able to do a cork 9 (not saying you lied at all this is just an example) So you can't ski because you're injured, you're bored just the fact of thinking about being able to do a cork 9 will trigger a response in your brain related to being excited or fulfilled. And you don't really mean harm with the lie but why not, it's the internet and you'll get a little self gratification from it that seems harmless but becomes a habit.
I have buddy who suffers from depression and when he gets bored he will lie. I guess an example is we're driving to the mountain and it's boring and no ones really talking he will say something like i was skating to class the other day and saw this crazy fight, thn he describes the fight, but the fight never happened. He lies just to have something exciting in his life to talk about and keep him from being bored. It's strange and he has talked to me one on one about it and it's just a weird mental thing related to depression and I love the kid. It sucks I can't trust him very well but he is my friend you know?
Everything will be good buddy you keep your chin up start healing and get back on your feet. Being active will help with your sleep as well. The fact you went from being so active to the opposite is what's affecting your sleep the most I bet. Get well brotha.
 
Dude i'm exactly like you.. I just don't get it and i don't get what i'm supposed to do about it. But i always think that something will happen someday and it will get better so I don't do anything about it, never talk about it because i don't know how to, but i hope it gets better for you man. PM me if you do talk to someone and what they say i would also enjoy to know.
 
Your right I lied three times in just that post it's ridiculous fuck so how do i fix this shit dam....

I lied about smoking weed only once a month it's on and off for example, prior to last 2 weeks I didn't smoke weed for about a while like a month but i've smoked maybe 3 or 4 times since.

My running was about 5 miles every 2 days but not too often did i run longer than 7 miles except that one time from westminister to golden which is true and I half ran/ walked about 26-27 miles (took me 5-6 hours ish)

Smaller one but i only have 2 articles to write not 3

I mean I do think and know that what i do is not good but I've done it all my life when you mention it.

I used to lie about tricks i landed on skis (eventually it forced me to do them to show my friends but at first I lied).

Then I had a faze when I lied about who I had sex with a lot. also lied about a bunch of drugs and some stories kinda like what u described. and probably a bunch more.

Shit like this is actually hard to admit on newschoolers.

So i think the proper course of action in this situation is getting professional help I'll prob set up an appointment with a counselor tomorrow. Being more active is also a great idea thanks man i appreciate your help. I'm sorry for all my bullshit.
 
karma sharma. doesn't matter to me. But no need to apologize dude. not to anyone. It's just one of those things you know. You have to break the habit and It won't happen immediately I think the fact you were able to admit to yourself and newschoolers (even though its just a website) says a lot about your character. It takes a lot to analyze yourself and say, hey you know I lied back then, I still lie now. You just have to make the conscious effort to make the change and I definitely think talking to someone is a great way to start. And I think a school counselor is the best, it's more or less anonymous, It's unbiased advice.
There is nothing wrong with you though so I hope you don't think that. You just need to make some changes is all. Its part of being a human being. It's life man like I said at least you are able to assess it point out your flaws thats really really commendable. Like I said keep your chin up. You have air in your lungs, thoughts in your head, and two feet to take you wherever you want. All is well in the world.
 
Dude. I think we might be the same person? exactly what you described (including the acl injury) happened, or is happening to me. I have felt personally that I am just burnt out, just a passage in my life where things seem really shit, but i dont know if they really are that bad. I do tend to tweak the truth abit in circumstances, and i like you also think the worst of myself. I dont know, however, if this is in anyway normal. Procrastinating is a part of my daily life somehow, especially when im in school. I guess its nice not to be the only one? at the same time i hope it gets much better for ya!
 
Life does have a purpose, maybe you just haven't figured out what it is. But i feel ya man. I'm a junior in high school, and lately i've been procrastinating on everything. I have a super easy schedule too. But you have a girlfriend, and from your post, she seems like a pretty solid girl. So maybe just sit down and talk to her sometime, vent your problems. She'll most likely have advice for you. Good luck man.
 
College is a time for discovery dude, no one knows what they want to do everyday they live, everyone gets lost from time to time. You'll find your rythm when you're supposed to.

But stop lying, and if the slump keeps up, it's never hurt to see a Dr man, there's no shame in that.
 
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