If your skis could talk what would they say?

seriously?

"ive got more chips than lay's"

"do you need to fall so much"

"wtf another frontflip"

 
" stop letting these little girls run into us, step on their skis, step on them real hard"

"fucking a man, could a n**** get a lil wax and a edge sharpen once in a while"
 
" For fuck sake! If you're not going to do anything about the asshole hitting the back of me in the lift line, I will!! Oh, and I'm getting a little tired of your girly little cowardly screaming everytime you flail helplessly through the air."
 
one pair wouldnt say anything cuz they died 3 years ago and im just defiling their corpses.
 
wow you're a douche. You realise this is a light-hearted thread? No-one's skis actually talk, right? Way to kill the vibe

And who the fuck cares if you said it earlier in the thread? Humans sometimes use the same words and phrases. It's not like once someone has said a sentence it can never be said by any other person ever again. So the same applies to skis.

-K for being a clueless idiot, and failing at understanding.
 
cant we go out in that soft stuff - it don't hurt... and come on lets tip this guy over again

the one about stop beeing on NS made me lol - its esy to waste ½ an houer on this site.
 
"alright so you have already pulled my retarded half brother out of retirement because he has somewhat better edges you know we are about to fall apart and still sliding rail hitting jumps... AND WHY THE FUCK DO YOU FEEL THE NEED TO DRIVE US ON CONCRETE !?" if my skis could talk i don't think they would love me unless they were some sorta kinky pair that gets off like that.
 
mine would just sing because they are just so stoked to be riding, probably all the tunes from this years ski movies. they might complain a bit at first because i am english and they dont get ridden that often.

Alternatively: "PLEASE DONT AFTERBANG!!"

Anyway you shouldn't anthropomorphize skis, they HATE it...(jks) :-)
 
"i'm bored, when do we get to go skiing?"
after skiing "call that skiing! it's fricking dry slope you dick!"
 
This season: "WTF is with all these rocks you keep hitting? I thought this was Colorado."

Tangent, but someone recently told me that Jon's personal skis not only have his girlfriend on the top sheet, but apparently she is naked on the bases. I wonder what happens when he puts them together. Do you think that he peeks in between them to make sure she isn't making out with herself?
 
no my friend i think its you who doesnt understand. i said it was a JOKE because the other guy thought i was serious. im not actually mad i was just saying i said that joke, make sense? besides, another person claimed his joke too
 
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