How to make mario kart 64 infinity times better

proZach

proZach

Active member
dropstick mario. my roommate invented it (i think). its a great way to get a buzz before leaving the apartment at night
open a beer. when the light hits the green from red to yellow to green (whatever the actual colors are), drink a third of your beer. then pick up your controller and race. after you cross the starting line, drop your controller and drink another third of your beer. pick it up and go. after the second lap, drop your shit again and finish your beer. then pick up your controller again and finish the race.
more or less, drink a full beer per game. can't win unless your beer is gone. then try to play the grand prix. mushroom cup is real hard because all the races are short as hell.
we did all 16 races, drinking every other game. by the end we were so full it was painful.
 
This has potential.

Possible variations? play battle, and every balloon you loose, you have a drink.

There could be a great any variations
 
hahaha i like that. makes you drink fast cause you wanna win. i might have to try this, but maybe with mario kart wii
 
i fucking hate battle so i don't play that, but its definitely a possibility. its hard to get drunk unless you have a really big stomach. but it'll definitely give you a buzz. watching yourself do worse and worse as you drink more is real funny too.
 
Battle is the shit,

Perhaps because i am so good at it. I suck at racing, especially rainbow road.

But after rethinking, I think there needs to be a greater punishment for loosing in the original game proposed, because in that form both players get equadrunk, or the looser drinks less.
 
this is actually a brilliant plan...

buddy just got a huge new TV... and we have mario kart 64 and lots of beer...

a variation of this will happen very soon.
 
thats fucking epic
but if you wanna get smashed faster than anything
play skate, and just sesh like the megaramp
when you fall, take a shot, and pass the controller on
trust me you get fucked realllllly quick
 
Make sure you have 4 people for this game, and are ready to get drunk quick. Winner per race takes 3 shots or short pulls, 2nd gets 2, 3rd gets 1, and 4th doesn't get to take a shot or small pull. This helps aid the game play because if someone is much better at it than everyone else, they'll get drunk pretty quick and begin to start losing. At this point, the shitty friend who regularly takes 4th begins winning games, and having to drink more. In the end, everyones fairly hammered, the best player gets drunk quick and begins to lose games, and the worst player gets drunk towards the end of your series of games. Drink every other race.
 
I must discuss this with the lads. I will have our version by tomorrow.

I'm off to buy 60 PBRs for tonight. Drinking heavily will definitely ensue tonight.
 
yeah i guess it should be worse for the people to lose, but if you're doing 2 person grand prix, by the end of the 16 races its hard to just finish the race in the top 4. usually its bad enough if you lose fuckin mario kart hah.
 
already heard of a simialar version. its called dont drink and drive. basically ur car has to be at a dead stop whenever u drink, and u can only drive when not drinking. beer has to be gone b4 u finish. basically the same but u can drink at any part of the race
 
done this before, it gets messy. but the correct answer to the question posed in the subject line of this thread is, you can't. because mario kart 64 is quite possibly the best game ever conceived.
 
Man I've been playing Mario Kart: Drunk Driving for years. Finish your beer before the race is over, winner takes a shot, loser takes a shot, all sorts of variations. Best game ever.
 
Great idea. But I'm gonna do this with Mario Kart Wii. I own at that game. And it takes a lot more coordination, so you're skills will go down the drain real fast if drinking.
 
if you play the game i suggested, you drink relatively quickly. if you do the mushroom cup, you drink 4 beers in about 10 minutes or less. fitting 48 oz. of liquid into my stomach in 10 minutes hurts. i'm not a big kid. but that doesn't get me near drunk as most people don't get drunk off 4 beers.
i could play 18 games in a night and be fucking hammered, but i'd have to sit there for a few hours. this is just our way of quick starting the night. followed by a half hour of pissing and digesting. then continue drinking and going out
 
oh, and the reason we don't take shots is because of the chugging. if you can't chug, you're going to lose (and a pussy). if you can't race, you lose. so you gotta be able to drink fast and race well. plus if you take shots you can only play for a few games until you're fucked or don't want to play anymore. beer is a much better gaming alcohol
 
my buddies and i would play Dragonball Z Budokai and if you lost you had to take a Beer Bong.... got shitfaced FAST.
 
after a while we just chug like 5/6th of the beer the first time around. but you just sorta guess at a third and not be that kid. because no one likes that kid. and you have to drop your controller so if you don't you're a cheater and thats just gay
 
we do that sometimes with cod4, just super simple, losing team in a tdm with 4 people has to chug a beer while the other team runs around trying to find and kill them
if the team finds and kills both members, the losing team has to drink from another beer for 10 seconds...no radar of course
its basically chugging it fast enough so the other team can't kill you at the spawn
im gonna try this with mario kart tho, it sounds WAY more fun
 
we got a few versions.

drink your place- what you finish is what you drink. add multipliers for more fun.

drinking while driving- gotta chug a beer before you finish the race, hands on the controller or the beer, never both. make it 2 beers for rainbow road.

leMans- shotgun a beer at the green light, pick up your controller and go

 
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