How Should I Kill My Boss?

shred.stickz

shred.stickz

Member
So I am a ski instructor at my local mountain of Yawgoo Valley, and me and my friend are the only park skiers that teach. My boss is stuck in the 80s with mogul skiing and making perfect turns. Now I'm sitting in a instructor meeting as we are talking about the dress code and what to wear while we are instructing. My friend and I are wearing our FD Wear, and my boss made us stand up to make us an example of what not to be. His quote was "You see these two? We do not want people here to think this is ok. We do not want the students to try park at all." Now I know most of you might of said something but I wasn't looking to get fired. So my question for you is A) What should I say to my boss? or B)How should I kill my boss for being so ignorant?
 
Say, "yo dawg my fd wear is so fly big dawg, tha park is my stompin ground yo i got to open the eyez of the kiiidz to tha park dawg. its the olympics, its tha future."
 
you weren't trill enough
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Look around you. How do the other instructors look? They do not look like you or rather, YOU do not look like them. If I was your boss I would absolutely want to present a cohesive, professional look. Your style is essentially thug or gangster. Why would any boss want his or her employees, who represent a ski mountain that caters to a fairly wealthy clientele, want any member of his or her staff to look like a thug or gangster?

Have some professionalism and pride. Get over yourself. There is a point when FD wear just makes you look dumb. You signed on to be a member of the staff, not to advance your personal fashion choice. You may as well accept that many jobs in this world, especially the better paying jobs, require one to look and dress a certain way. You cannot be a banker with a massive beard and long hair. You cannot be a waiter at a 5 star restaurant with dreads.

What you should say to your boss? Say that you're sorry you overlooked the dress code and will take the necessary steps to correct it. Show up tomorrow dressed like every other damned person on staff. Your boss will appreciate you owning up to this far more than he or she will appreciate you trying to advance your personal dress style while under the mountain's employ. Which do you want? The job or to wear FD wear?
 
You realize while working as a ski instructor you're obligated to teach people how to ski and not use it as freeski time to fuck around in the park. In addition, first drop gear for that? really?

 
grow up.

i teach too, and guess what we have a dress code. and for liability reasons, no instructor can take their class through the "big" park. thats how it is in almost every resort because at the end of the day, park rats don't take too many lessons. ski schools make money off of little kids, older beginners and a few intermediate level skiers and the number one priority is always safety so they keep coming back. oh and knowing perfect turn technique is what being a good instructor is about, i recommend you take some notes on mogul technique because mogul skiers are incredibly versatile, theres a reason most of the legends are ex mogul skiers.

when you teach you are at work, and if you want to hit park you do that on your own time. if at some point you are teaching someone who is very comfortable on blacks and they ask you to teach them to slide a box or hit a jump, then maybe your boss might make an exception if you approach him maturely.

 
I know you think he's discriminating against park skiing but seriously, he's on our side. No one wants gapers learning to ski for the first time to be thinking about going in the park.
 
Agreed. I have seen some dudes throw down in the park but have seen some of them make some seriously pathetic runs outside of the park. Little kids shouldnt learn park until they can fucking ski
 
You may also want to take a long, hard look at the decisions you make. You do realize there are thousands of kids on this website and one of them just may find it hilarious to send a link to this post to your boss. Just for the hell of it I googled your mountain and looked at the ski school section. It took all of one minute. It would take me thirty seconds more to send this link to your boss and get you fired. Think these things through.
 
i get the dress code. its a job and you shouldn't wear that shit. does he mean skiing park during a lesson or just skiing park in general? or he could just be really bad at sarcasm.
 
You wanna do what to his dick?

He has a point. If you value your job, you'll suck it up and wear what you're told to or expected to. Plain and simple.

Beyond that, I'm amazed your "mountain" doesn't have uniforms for the instructors. Just about every hill I've been to, the instructors are given a jacket and required to buy pants or pants are all included.

 
Yeah fuck that 80's shit trying to teach people how to make "perfect turns" and "ski moguls." What do they think you are, a ski instructor or some shit?

You suck and should be fired. I pity those who have to take lessons from you
 
How about not acting like a punk dumb ass and calling him out on his bullshit? Maybe you should have pointed out how park skiing reversed the trend of younger skiers switching over to snowboarding... or maybe you should have pointed out how park skiing IS A FUCKING OLYMPIC SPORT.

He's right on one thing, you do make park skiing look bad.
 
the only way to counteract is him is to perform reverse psychology.

Step One: Develop yourself a form of 80s outerwear style. the one piece suit making you look like a flaming retarded skittle never goes wrong. Once your boss sees how "radical" you are, he'll realize you never wanted to wear FD, you just did it because the other guy did it too.

Step Two: Complain. Nothing gets your mind off the fact your job blows. Things to complain about:

1. How much your kids blow

2. How shitty the weather is

3. How shitty your mountain is

Step Three: Quit. it's not like you even enjoy teaching little kids pizza and french fry when all their drinking is hot chocolate, and complaining how cold is it on a blue bird..if those even exist where you are.

Step Four: Move out west.
 
Honestly it looks much more professional when everyone rocks a uniform or at least wears something decent looking. You may think your 5xl gear is awesome but parents who are paying for their kids to take lessons do not. Is it really that hard to swap jackets for lessons/lineups and then free ride in your gear?

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Life is so fucking hard sometimes.
 
B) 1. Lock your boss in his office. 2. Turn on Wu-Tang. 3. Shove a 5xl Virtika shirt down his throat to block his airways while hailing to Lord Lesh 4. Put his body in Traveling Circus van to rot away along with all of the moldy pizza.
 
The professional thing would be to meet with him privately and tell him you do not appreciate being called out in front of the group like that, if he has a problem with your work attire he can address you privately. The problem is that ski instructing is a fucking slave ship, and if your manager was worth his weight in horse shit he wouldn't be at his current position. so get out while you can before you inevitably get fired for some other meaningless reason that makes no sense.
 
comon guys, yeah OP is a tool, but its a fucking ski school. idk how they are somewhere else, but here its definitely not a 100% "serious" job.

although its stupid to take kids in the park insurance-wise and just usual to wear the same stuff so you are recognized as a ski instructor.
 
Fuck no. You've got it all wrong. Being a good instructor means you can deal with different kinds of people, and cope with kids, be supportive, and make the kids fall in love with skiing, show them doing turns is not the only thing you can do while skiing. Knowing the perfect turn technique comes last on the list in my books.
 
I was hoping someone else would but youre all a bunch of pussies.

Email sent. Fuck you OP.

Merry fucking Christmas, asshole
 
this. take some time and look at the PSIA handbook. How much of that is about turning? LIKE 99 FUCKING PERCENT YOU ASSWIPE. Ski Instructing = teaching people how to stand up, slide etc, and the MAIN, BIGGEST, POINT IS HOW TO TURN, and how to use turning. Its not about park.

In fact if you take a group of kids to the park without a PSIA Park Certification and a kid breaks a leg, guess who gets fucked? Your tiny local hill thats one lawsuit away from a KSL takeover. No more job or park or ski season for you. It sounds like you have no fucking idea what you signed up for. Every resort job I've ever had or seen has a dress code and uniform. Its part of life, and its part of making your students respect you as a person and in turn listen to your instructions rather than thinking you're some skinny ass white kid, whose dad is a doctor, who got dropped of in his mom's lexus, who decided today was Be a Black Rapper From 2002 Day.

If you want to be thuggin in First Drop, do it on your own time. Be smart about it, hell even David Lesh wore a suit to meet Obama. If your boss gets pissed for you skiing park on your free time and dressing how you want, then theres an issue. But when you're getting paid to do something, you shut the fuck up and do it.

Grow the fuck up you lazy park rat piece of shit.
 
fair enough. safety, help your students have fun so they keep coming back, then teach good technique, thats the list of priorities. what i was getting at is that the difference between a psia level III instructor who makes pretty good money versus someone who teaches at a low level and barely makes enough to pay rent is their knowledge of technique and how to best teach it.
 
Download TOR (The Onion Router) and poke around on the hidden wiki for many usefull tips on how to kill your boss and get away with it.

MUAHAHAHAHA

Brb someone's at the door...

....SHIT!
 
Didn't take long for the snitches to come out. If someone seriously emailed this link to Yawgoo ski area you are pathetic and sad and deserve any and all bad shit that happens to you.

I can't imagine a little hill like this gives instructors uniforms so I don't see what the big deal is with a kid wanting to look cool leading younguns. And theres no black diamonds or steeps to push the kids on to make them get better so why not bring em in the park and teach them how to grind a rail?
 
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