How much time do you spend alone?

S

Spic-N-SpaN

Active member
Ive just been doing a lot of self reflecting lately and would like to know how other people spend there time.

for me its probably 55% of my time is spent alone
 
A ton. I rarely ever invite friends over, or go to friend's houses, and basically only ever hang out with people outside of my family at school, while skiing, or at the occasional party. That's not to say I don't enjoy other people's company, but I've never been one to seek it. I'm perfectly content spending an entire weekend by myself.
 
I live alone, so unless I'm at school, visiting my parents, or out with friends, I'm just chilling by myself.
 
I think part of what Im trying to figure out is if Im an introvert, or just have a lot of social anxiety. Supposably to be a true introvert your supposed to never get lonely, and I do after long periods of time. So I feel like somethings wrong with me for being socially anxious, when before I passed it of as just being an introvert, and am trying to better my life and make sure Im happy, because I dont want to slip into depression. I just feel weird hanging out with friends and they all have tons of other friends that they go and do other things with but for me its either with those kids or alone. I just wish I had other things to be doing.
 
For the past semester I have been in california with my family. about once a month for a week or week and a half i'll go back to boulder to hang out then I come back home. I am here at my parents for the next three weeks. And i finally go back for good. My dad was in the military so I finished my last two years of high school in colorado and I go to college at CU. So I know literally no one here in california only the people that I have met since I've been here. I spend all day long alone with my dog until about 6 when my parents get home, they go to bed around 9 then i'm alone again. so i'd say about 20-21 hours a day i'm alone. recently i have met a girl which is nice. I had a lady friend for a while before christmas but that ended as well. I am alone a lot and it fucking sucks i am a very very very social person. It's been torture being here and every little week long vacation i have back home in colorado is like a god send. I can't wait to go back home. I can't wait. But i have learned a lot about myself being alone. when you're alone for this long you can really delve into your own head which can show you a lot about yourself. Its been a good experience. But ready to have a life again. I miss my friends. I miss being able to snowboard whenever i feel like it.
 
Hey, were all different. I am definitly an intravert, we are the minority ( or so it seems, you dont see allot of intraverts because.... they dont come out) When you feel comfortable go out, when you dont .. then dont. Nothing wrong with that.If anyone tells your different , Fuck em.
 
last few weeks probably 99% i'm having finals and i'm the only one who's studying in our apartment, all the others went home to study...only time i see other people is when i go out for groceries ....
 
Once i started college i kinda just stopped hanging out with friends. ill go to parties with them mabye once a month, or ski with them every other weekend..but i really dont chill with people anymore unless im at college..and there we only talk to waste time before next class.

But i always have a girl to chill with. Not as a friend, more of a sexual relationship...i just like to keep girls around cuz its nice to be around someone who truley enjoys your company and would rather be around you than anybody else. Makes u feel good about yourself.
 
ill say 3-4 hours a day on an average day, most of that time being in the evening fucking off on my computer before im tired enough to pass out.
 
So obviously this is an alias, but I spend a lot of time alone.

I suffer from severe social anxiety, which sometimes leads to depression and other things. I'd like to try to help everyone out there who feels the same way, whether you're lurking this thread or just reading this post randomly.

Do something every day that challenges you socially. It may seem very difficult at first, but just go talk to people. Get drunk first, idk whatever helps you, but do not rely on a drug long term. I have a psychological addiction to opioids and benzos, both of which help me immensely with my anxiety and resulting depression. Do not fall into this trap. Force yourself to go out there and just talk to people, as hard as it may seem (it's hard as fuck, trust me). I'm in college at CU (HotAssBeatClap, feel free to message me) and I force myself to go to parties.

I'm lucky enough to have a very social girlfriend who encourages me. If it was up to me, I wouldn't leave my little comfort zone. I now know that it is important to challenge yourself. Surprise yourself. Do something you don't see yourself normally doing and see what happens.

Whatever, I'm drunk. But I want people to be happy and not suffer the same way I have. As much as it may be hard/unappealing to talk or interact with other people, just do it. Honestly, I just wanted to get this off my chest. Thanks NS.

Whoever reads this, feel free to message me, don't be shy. I'd love to talk to somebody who feels the same way as me for once.
 
I would have to say if I didn't have a job dealing with the public it would probably be most of the time.. Back home rarely spent any time alone.. I like to have my own space at times but at the same time I feel it kinda makes me go a little insane without people to interact with... whether it be on the internet or whatever. I do however have a bit of social anxiety I guess or the worry of saying the wrong thing in conversations. The hardest thing I think is working at a starbucks(I know its sucks dont remind me) I have to try and spark up conversations with random people all day. its probably one of the hardest things to do, I always find myself with a lot of time being in awkward moments on the till being like hey... hows it going today.. thats good. or thats bad then rest of the time people are at the till its just and awkward silence... there have been a few occasions I've had some good conversation. as for the majority of the time its spend me drumming on my till... i find I sometimes have the stupidest things to say to hot women too.. I'm all like enjoying the weather then there like I like the snow outside and I'm all like yah snows awesome... then silence... then me trying to start the conversation again but every attempt is like from every socially awkward situation in movies... like superbad when the girl talks to him(micheal cera) near the beggining of the movie... funny when I think about it now... but all in all I see where some people come from about not really liking social interation it is easier to communicate behind the comfort of a computer screen....
 
I love being alone. This might come off as arrogant sounding (which is not my intention) but I have a personality that people seem to be attracted to, so I never get to spend as much time alone as I would like. Sometimes I'll got like a week and just avoid going out and hanging out with people but then I feel bad for ignoring them.

My friends are always stopping by at our house and stuff. I'd love to go a while with no phone, no computer and no people.
 
When I lived at home I spent a decent amount of time alone. But now that im in college its almost impossible for me to have alone time haha. Everybody always wants to go do shit 24/7.
 
well i spend about 12 hours a day at school and 6+ hours sleeping so that leaves 6 hours. those 6 hours are spent A. watching netflix with my sister B. more time at school for w/e reason C. dinner or D. with a friend

i don't really spend that much time alone
 
I spend a lot of time with other people. After school, which ends around 3 I'm at a friends until about 6. Sometimes I go out on the weekdays, maybe a couple times a week. On the weekend I'm often out from 11AM to midnight, if I'm not skiing. The only activity aside from just chilling at my house that I do alone is skiing sometimes, because I don't have friends that go as often as I do. And after skiing I usually go out from 5 to 1.
 
i'm introverted and i still get lonely, heres a thing i found online about introverts (from what i can tell they're all true)

Unfortunately, according to the book, only about 25% of people are Introverts. There are even fewer that are as extreme as I am. This leads to a lot of misunderstandings, since society doesn’t have very much experience with my people. (I love being able to say that.)

So here are a few common misconceptions about Introverts (not taken directly from the book, but based on my own life experience):

Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.

This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.

Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.

Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.

Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.

Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.

Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.

On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.

Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.

Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.

Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.

Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.

Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.

Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.

Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.

Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.

Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.

Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.

Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.

A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.

“You cannot escape us, and to change us would lead to your demise.”
 
I love hanging out with people, but in small doses. One night is usually enough, then I feel the urge to crawl back into my cave again, I value alone-time. I get tired of people very easily, I notice small things about them that gets me annoyed and then I just want to leave asap.

75% of my time with people, 25% alone

 
there you have it, we don't like being 100 percent alone

luckily i have that one person to talk to and even though she lives back home (2 states away from where i go to boarding school) she's my closest and most important friend, if not my only one sometimes
 
I read that introverts may be socially outgoing and then require some alone time to recharge; or they may just be total hermits too. there's nothing wrong with it, it's just how you're wired. take a personality test and it'll tell you pretty conclusively what 'you are' and it even explains things more clearly about yourself that makes more sense when spelled out clearly by psychologists. they're all over the internet.
 
fuck, this is so true

even if i like the person alot sometimes this gets me bad. last week i was chilling with my cousins and one of their girlfriends along with 2 other friends and one of them brought up how my uncle is always left out of the conversation. like 2 hours before we had been watching tv and saw that credit card commercial with the girl climbing the huge rock. so he looked up the girl and was trying to show everybody some of the crazy videos of her climbing these rock structures with no harness or ropes. he thought it was really cool and i did too, and i think everybody else would've if they'd have taken their eyes off the tv for like 2 seconds. so were talking about this and they're making fun of how nobody wanted to see what he had looked up and nobody cares about what he thinks is cool and i felt awful about it the whole time and immediately got pretty disappointed/angry with them.
 
I have been doing this alot recently especially at the bars. But it is usually when im drunk so that kinda pushes me forwards to do it, it almost always works out well. When it dosnt, just accept it and move on.
 
dis be me
Untitled-1.jpg
 
I spend a good amount of time on my own, I have changed my ways a little but its hard to talk to people since i had this stomach thing.

January '11 till like June I had it were I would get nauseous for like 4 days in a row, weekly and I lost like 15 pounds. During that time I really didn't spend any time with people at all, and I lost that "bro" status with a lot of my friends that I used to be so tight with. Its like I dont know what to say to them or anyone for that matter. the only people I feel totally comfortable around are my parents. and like talking to girls, I have nothing to say to them and its always awkward. Its weird, I feel like my stomach shit just fucked my social life over and now i forgot how to be a normal person.

During that time I delved into my brain and I have pretty much figured out that for me, confidence is everything, but I still cant fucking do it. Sometimes I'll go to a party and be so social like I used to but most of the time I dont talk to anyone except like 3 or 4 people.
 
i spend a fair amount of time alone, and even after prolonged periods away from friends i still never really feel lonely as such. like, in summer i went about two months only seeing friends once. i often find myself overlooked in some situations and a lot of the time i don't say much/ keep to myself. this is mostly because i don't have anything to say and i don't often speak for the sake of it, but also because i refuse to compete with people for attention. also sometimes when i'm in a group of people i won't really interact with parts of the group , although that's mostly because i notice the smallest details in people and they just annoy me or whatever, not because i'm awkward. (i don't know if this is making any sense to be honest)

basically my point is, even though i make friends easily and have a lot in common with other people, i also find i'm mostly my own person. i dress differently to my friends, listen to different music and have different interests. i know this sounds like a really dickish thing to say, but i also think of myself as more intelligent and sophisticated than a lot of people my age, which is why i sometimes find it hard to relate to certain people or i don't have things to say to them. i don't mean that in an arrogant way, i just know i understand things/ people way better and know about more stuff than others.

however, i still have loads of friends and partake in every social activity possible. i'm always the one who's up for going out, getting drunk/ high, getting with girls etc etc.

i don't find being alone any kind of problem, often i genuinely want to be alone and just listen to music, play guitar or whatever. i think that these days there's such a stigma around being alone, like you always have to be with friends, talking to people or whatever, but i feel being alone every now and then is good for you and everyone needs it, and just some people, myself included, are better at it than others.

 
i enjoy hanging out with people, but i love being alone, my roomate will come home and i'll lock my self in my room and play video games/browse the web/beat off...the usual.
 
quite a lot of time lately..i'm renting an apartment by myself in avoriaz,france so evenings are pretty lonely, and going out to bars alone kinda sucks..but hey, i'm a ski-bum now so i get to ski every day.

+my girl is coming over here for a week on friday so it's cool
 
not too much maybe only a hour a day because of school and living with 2 brothers and my mom and dad im never all by myself
 
All of us at some time in our lives have to come to terms with who we are, this transitional time is usually confusing and difficult but eventually, somehow, one day things just make sense. It is probably the accumulation of months of thought and heightened self-awareness. At least for me it was.

Whether you turn out to be extroverted, or introverted doesn't matter, but don't let yourself stop growing by prematurely categorizing yourself as one or the other. The best advice I can give is to be pursue happiness. If you are anxious about something force yourself to do it until you realize that it just isn't for YOU and there is no shame in that, or that you actually did like it and you were just shy.
 
I feel ya, i can tell withing 5 seconds if this person is somone of "value" to me or just another person like everyone else. < Way over simplified way to say that.

This is a great thread!
 
i value alone time, especially being a senior in hs i gotta enjoy it now before i move to a dorm and have someone constantly around me. but as i read a few post on here i noticed its different for when it comes to hanging out with your girlfriend. for me, personally i could have her around 24/7 and not care, but with some of my guy friends im not too enthusiastic when they ask me to hangout UNLESS were gonna do something active like skiing or a game of snow football aha.
but anyways ive come to notice that you shouldnt think your unsocial or a loser if you spend time alone even on friday/saturday nights. do what you think you'll have the most fun with and stick to it.
 
I am an introvert also, so I like being alone but because I have had people oriented jobs I learned to interact with people better. Also, I'm most definitely an adrenalin junkie.. And i like parties and crowds, but I listen/people watch more. I like being an introvert... It means I can spend more time alone :)
 
It's weird, because personally, this makes me go pretty much insane. If I can't chill with my friends for a day, you can tell. I will be anxious and pretty damn pissed off. I guess i'm happy to be like that.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top