Funny, gross and absurd nicknames

I'm sometimes known as Blumpkin Queen at my hill.

It's a long story and does NOT involve me giving someone a blumpkin, hahahaha
 
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Alright, here's the story.

So I work as park crew at my hill and we had ambassadors (really old people) who were in charge of checking tickets. And park crew never wore jackets, and we had passes that just had our picture on it and this one guy, Marshall, was a huge asshole to every single park crew member except me. Like he would make people get out of line and stuff but he would never even check mine and be super nice to me.

It eventually turned into this joke that I gave Marshall blumpkins and that's why he was so nice to me. Some of the staff even wrote on our log shit like "6:22 - Gave Marshall blumpkins". That got us in a lot of trouble.

Anyways, so I was deemed the Blumpkin Queen because of that. One of the park crew and myself were teaching a lesson one night to a bunch of little kids and he got them all to actually call me Blumpkin Queen all night, they don't know what it fuckin meant.

It got out of hand.
 
I know somebody named B.J.
And "onegog", because his eyes are really close together, and somepeople think he'd only need one swimming goggle.
 
we call this kid from miami jong

it stands for jerk off noobie gaper and it's also the sound it makes if you hit a lift pole
 
ahh no that would have been a huge compliment compared to what it was. Christ is actually my real nickname now... id say its a big step up
 


I'm sometimes known as Long Dong by some girls.

It's a long story and does NOT involve me having a big dick....

wait
 
haha k it was cumdumpster but much like the blumkin queen it nothing to do with actually being a cumdumpster. i think i just had really mean friends.

and maybe and episode where i drunkely devulged some techiniques of mine. in my defense i was blackout.
 
i like to cum, and dumpsters get rid of trash (which is a positive thing)

youve got 2 good things going for you there
 
twin tip hero. there was a group of kids int eh park from my school that have never seen park before. so i told them i was going to dom something that will blow their socks off. well i was going in switch and caught my front edge on the lip of the jump. crashed and burned badly. so some girl came up and told me i was her twin tip hero. lol the name kinda stuck hence the username
 
One of my good friends goes by DB. Pretty much everyone calls him that and not his real name. I don't even think twice about it anymore.
 
My nickname is seanvict from when i got arrested...
But one of my buddies nicknames is "tampon" cuz he always has his first aid stuff with him so he can "clean up blood"
 
Shit Stain.
Our hockey team was playing in a tourney and there was this huge brown stain on the back of one guy's boxers while we were changing; hence shit stain.
 
My nickname was Derb since freshman year of highschool. not really sure why, some kid in football just thought it worked, and it stuck for quite some time. I am pretty sure that some younger kids still at the highschool never knew my real name, but they definetly could identify me as derb.
 
these girls nicknamed me 'risky-dick' because i was taking a piss in there presence with the bathroom door open
 
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