FMYLIFE.com

haha it has been..i only saw one thread tho..but really who cares the thread tittle did not indicate what it was so it was impossible to search for..and its super funny. this thread will cause more people to see it, and possible add some stories..
 
Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML

i just wasted 1 hour. thanks

 
Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home and I was calling bingo

numbers. And one woman stood up and started making noises, I asusmed

she had won and I started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died

of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

hahah so funny but so terrible
 
"Today my lesbian sister enthusiastically showed me her new strap on. Not only does she get more girls than me, she now has a bigger penis too. FML"

bahahahahhaha holy shit
 
Shit is so funny. Best one i read is:

"Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML"

Such a standard thing for guys to do
 
Today, everyone at school was talking about some guy that had sex with another girl while he was going out with someone. I started to spread the rumor myself, until someone told me that that guy was my boyfriend. The other girl was my best friend. FML
 
rofl Today, I heard my sister masturbating in her room. I took the dog around the block to get out of the house, and I came back to see her exiting her room....my electric tothbrush in her hand. FML
 
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