its clear that you understand how to use effects, but try using them in a way that will enhance the clips.  Watch some of the abekisletvitz videos (though that may be where you got some of the ideas), and try to see how he does it and what makes them good, but also try to be original.  As far as the edit, make it longer and get more footage, and try to progress with your ability (and your friends).  As I said, you already have the understanding of the programs, which is a part of it, but it is only a part, not the whole thing, filming, talent, music, and your story all help make the edit.  Also if this is a troll, sorry that I'm a nice guy