One day I want to meet a girl with a real vagina. I'll never forget the day I was about to loose my virginity. It was valentines weekend. Her parents were gone for the night and she was home alone. I was 15 at the time, so I got a ride over to her house from my mom. We're on the couch watching Transporter 3 and we start to mess around. Making out quickly escalates. She tells me she's ready. I take my pants off and she takes her shirt off. I unhook her bra and then ask her if she's ready. She says yes. I start to slide off her jeans. I'm behind her, so I can't see the lump protruding from her panties. She takes them off and turns to me. That's when I see it. It wasn't even impressive. It was no more than 5 inches and it had a deformed head. I stagger back, agape. All of a sudden, spaghetti starts to spew relentlessly from the pockets of my jeans. She jumps on top of me, and whispers "I hope you're ready". I'm desperate to escape the situation. In a last ditch effort to evade anal penetrate, I leap to the spaghetti-spewing pants, receiving multiple facefulls of the hot wet pasta in the process. My iron grip was so tight, even Stalin would be impressed. At this point, the spaghetti is flying from my pockets at almost 600 mph. I turn y
