Do you empathize with people who are suffering?

B

BonusNo413

Member
Right this moment, there's children dying of cancer. Teenagers, and people in their twenties too, that were living normal healthy lives, got diagnosed with cancer, and are now having existential panic attacks about the idea of ceasing to exist and the fact that they might never see the ocean again, probably won't ever get married, have kids, or maybe even need to get their penis and testes amputated (it happens). There's innocent people in prison serving life sentences without the possibility of parole. There's someone trying a noose right now that they will actually use to kill themselves with.

Personally, if there was something like this happening in the same room as me, I wouldn't be able to eat, sleep, or comprehend much.

This stuff really is all happening on my planet. There's men in their twenties and even teens getting their heads cut off by their army's enemies. People really do commit suicide and die of drug overdoses and get hit by drunk drivers and get diagnosed with ALS and fall and hit their heads the wrong way and end up with brain damage or in a coma or whatever. This is all absolutely real.

What's also absolutely real is the constant threat of the unknown nature of the future while knowing that really anything can happen, and does happen to people all the time.

Like this guy, for example:


I'm overwhelmed by all this every day. I'm always questioning why there's so much suffering in our universe/in the world.

Don't you feel all this too?

Do you empathize with those who suffer and can't live like we can, whose lives are being cut short?

I just can't understand it. Why are some people born rich and some born poor? Why do some die at 3 and some at 103?
 
Maybe keep it in one thread?

Op what happened? This is the second of two separate threads about suffering, with a large focus on cancer. You alright?

Also to answer your question it depends on the circumstances. If you're there when it happens or know the person, it's much easier to empathize but you're also gonna feel that pain in some way or another. I got too many stories to count. Otherwise if it's some random situation on the news, it might get a "well that sucks" or "that's terrible" sort of feeling but we all carry on because the world doesn't stop. No sense getting caught up in all the drama. At the end of the day some of us go home and some of us don't. Oh well.
 
Seeing the image of his mom in the car was hard. Losing a child is like fucking unbelievable in my view. Like honestly im not a badass or anything but if i was going to die i would mostly be sad for what it would do to my family. I feel so bad for parents who have kids who have died.

but we are all going to the same place in the end. Everybody is going to die in the end, spaceship or no spaceship, and we will all be together at that point.

The best thing we can do in the meantime:

1019585.jpeg

Is realize even germans can be funny
 
Isn’t the fact that you don’t know if you have one of the short straws of life a damn good reason to live it up today?

Honestly it’s thoughts like that keep me skiing and outside doing shitty jobs that are cool but don’t pay well.

Im sure I will regret in my 50s if I make it that long but

c'est la vie.

1019624.jpeg
 
Also relevant quote by someone old and smart. I was give this by a old blue collared ski bum I knew in Aspen.

“This is the true joy in life, the being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.

I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no "brief candle" for me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”

-George Bernard Shaw
 
14353387:50Kal said:
Isn’t the fact that you don’t know if you have one of the short straws of life a damn good reason to live it up today?

Honestly it’s thoughts like that keep me skiing and outside doing shitty jobs that are cool but don’t pay well.

Im sure I will regret in my 50s if I make it that long but

c'est la vie.

View attachment 1019624
Click to expand...

Is this the bus from that into the wild movie?

i kind of thought his decision to give away all his money was idiotic. He couldve bought a badass tent/sleeping bag and his life in the wilderness wouldve been so much better.

still an interesting movie tho.
 
Using empathy honestly for me is just a great way to filter out assholes in your life or to figure out who's real and who isn't. Empathy for me when it comes to not-so-great people is like a way of giving them the benefit of the doubt until they run out of chances and show their true colors, but its also a way to learn about being in others shoes and sharing things/feelings/beliefs in common with those who have gone through shit or are currently are, not to get too philosophical.

I see the rabbit hole that you;re going down, OP, because Ive gone down it quite a bit in the past and still do from time to time. It has to do with my anxiety certainly and feeling "Guilty" that the worlds burning down around you and you don't have it worse, it turns into this weird "looking out for problems" lens to look through and I urge you to understand that its not as black and white as you're making it out to be. If you need to go talk to someone, feel free too, because they'll be more understanding than us assholes on a ski forum.
 
14353516:dolanslebensraum said:
Is this the bus from that into the wild movie?

i kind of thought his decision to give away all his money was idiotic. He couldve bought a badass tent/sleeping bag and his life in the wilderness wouldve been so much better.

still an interesting movie tho.
Click to expand...

Yeah was at the bus in 2014
 
14353296:dolanslebensraum said:
Seeing the image of his mom in the car was hard. Losing a child is like fucking unbelievable in my view. Like honestly im not a badass or anything but if i was going to die i would mostly be sad for what it would do to my family. I feel so bad for parents who have kids who have died.

but we are all going to the same place in the end. Everybody is going to die in the end, spaceship or no spaceship, and we will all be together at that point.

The best thing we can do in the meantime:

View attachment 1019585

Is realize even germans can be funny
Click to expand...

me at the begining:?

me at the end:?
 
No. It's not my job to carry the world's emotional burden.

I dissociate from the bad and express joy and gratitude for the good. If I have absolutely no choice but to confront a negative situation, I'll be as quick and hands-off as possible about it.

It's a very conscious effort to be a happy idiot frolicking around in carefree innocence.

Is it the right way to do it? I have no idea. Im testing it out rn cuz it beats being anxious and miserable all the time.

But hey, atm I'm happier, healthier, more well-adjusted and better at critical thinking than ever.

So idk what to tell ya... maybe just, give yourself a rest OP.
 
14354143:larilinesign said:
No. It's not my job to carry the world's emotional burden.

I dissociate from the bad and express joy and gratitude for the good. If I have absolutely no choice but to confront a negative situation, I'll be as quick and hands-off as possible about it.

It's a very conscious effort to be a happy idiot frolicking around in carefree innocence.

Is it the right way to do it? I have no idea. Im testing it out rn cuz it beats being anxious and miserable all the time.

But hey, atm I'm happier, healthier, more well-adjusted and better at critical thinking than ever.

So idk what to tell ya... maybe just, give yourself a rest OP.
Click to expand...

I guess what I'm trying to say OP is just take it day by day and ultimately you'll find a way to reconcile things.
 
You never know what day is your last so just enjoy your life do things you want to do and be with people who make you feel good. Yea you could get wiped out anytime but that should just light a fire under your ass to live life the way you want

**This post was edited on Nov 27th 2021 at 11:00:41pm
 
I do. At work when I'm with a paitent in the ER. I definitely do. It gets me some times. The begging not to die. The couple who have been married 73 years and one is definitely on the way out and the other spouse is figuring it out . It can be brutal. I manage to leave most of it at work. But there are things I'll never forget.

Also I go to therapy. It helps
 
This is such a broad question, so many factors but if a drunk driver runs over someone and goes to jail, I don't feel sorry for them for being in jail but I do sympathize with the person who got run over.
 
Palestinians, yes. Children being incinerated by white phosphorous with US tax money because Likudnik jews want a greater Israel is disgusting. The US has become a nation of legalese, undermining the duty of responsible morality.
 
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