I rented a 3 bedroom house when I was around 20 with 2 of my best buds. One of my roommates(B) was always away for work for 1+ month at a time so he was never really around, but we took in one of his old friends (J) that lived in our unfinished basement for cheap. Then there was me and (T).
I dabbled with experimenting with drugs but I was mainly a drinker. It was mostly just Booze and weed around the house. We started to have this guy coming to the house periodically asking is T was around. T had a girlfriend he was always with and I didn't run into him much except for when he came home from work so I always told this guy I hadn't seen him. This happened for a month or two until T finally had his tires slashed on his car.
Within a month of this happening, I invited a friend (L) over to kick it and drink. He really didn't want to come to the house, he wanted to go out to the bars but I wasn't feeling it. I finally convinced him to come over. Myself, J, and L are just sitting in the living room on couch watching a movie, drinking, passing a blunt around. To give you a visual, we had an big L-shaped couch that went up against 3 very large windows to the front of the house.
T was home and was walking back and forth from his room, through the living room, and looking out the front door. T was acting himself, making comments on parts of the movie he liked, laughing with us, and we would pass him the blunt every time he walked by. After 20min or so, T finally walked out the front door and onto the front deck in front of the large windows. I go to pass the blunt to J on my left and am now facing the large windows. As soon as J puts his hand on the blunt, we heard an extremely loud *BANG* and I watch T fall to the ground outside. Me, J, and L jump up from our seats. I run to the front door to look out the window (dark outside) and see a vehicle backed into our driveway with someone standing at the back of the vehicle. I immediately lock the door and yell that someone just shot T. J and L immediately run out the back door into the back yard. I throw on some muck boots sitting next to me and realize in those seconds that person would have been able to push the house and be at the deck and would be seen through the door or large windows if I head to the back door. In those split seconds, I just accepted I was fucked and that I was next. I take cover behind the corner of the entry way peeking at the door and take out my phone and call 911.
The dispatcher answers "911 what is the address of your emergency". I was in so much shock that all I could say was "ummmmm" about 5 times while the dispatcher asked me the same question. I was finally able to blurt out what had happened. The unknown person I saw never came to the front door so I pushed forward to try and look out the door and into the driveway. The vehicle was now gone. Looking out the window, I could see a gun on the deck and T laying face down. That's was when I realized that T had just shot himself. I opened the door and just peered down at T telling the dispatcher what I was looking at. T was taking periodic deep breathes and started yelling at the dispatcher to get an ambulance and asking where it was as he was still breathing. At the time I did not know this, but T was having agonal breathes, he was dead. The dispatcher asked me if I knew CPR. I didn't at the time which I told him, but also explained that there was too much blood and that I couldn't do anything. The police and ambulance showed up a few minutes later.
By this time, J and L had come back to the house. The police separated all of us to question us and make sure our stories lined up to make sure they were not dealing with a homicide. I remember at the time being so upset being treated like I was a suspect and criminal. L does not do very well with law enforcement and I could hear him crying and yelling at the officers. The officer I was with brought me over to his patrol vehicle and allowed me to sit in the passenger seat with him while we talked about the events that just happened. The officer then allowed me to call B to tell him what had happened as he was away at work.
I later found out that T was an undercover pill head. All the clues were there, I was just oblivious to it happening right in front of me at the time. Me not seeing T often? T window to his room was on the front of the house. He left the window unlocked and when he came home/left, just crawled through the window so we never knew he was there. The guy at the end of the driveway and the one who kept coming to the house looking for T? That was his drug dealer who he owed approximately $4,000.00. After T dodged him for so long, he couldn't take the harassment from him anymore, his drug habit, and the issues he was having with his girlfriend. T called up his drug dealer, told him to meet him at the house, and then shot himself with a gun he stole from his Dad as the drug dealer walked towards him to confront him on the front deck.
Of course this experience traumatized J, L, and me. To make an already long story shorter, J is not alive anymore as he went down the drug route and overdosed. L ended up getting into heroin, but is now clean. He is not the same person that I once knew. Me? It took me years to figure myself out, but I hated how the police treated us that night and made it a goal to start a career in law enforcement so that no one had to feel the way that I did that day and have someone they could rely on in the moments they needed someone most. I've now been a Police Officer for 7 years dealing with the same situation more times than I can remember. I've been there to talk people out of taking their own life, I've been there and watched people take their life in front of me while I was there, reliving the worst day of MY life. I've also received life saving awards for people that I have saved after they attempted to take their own life. I probably wouldn't be the person I am today with out this whole experience, and I wish T was still here today, but it will haunt me the rest of my days.
