you're right that we haven't seen you ski, but 100% relying on a softer boot to solve your shinbang problems will not work because there are MULTIPLE cause and effect patterns that dictate the reality of shinbang.
here's a general list of the main causes of shinbang (in no particular order):
-no footbed
-boot is wrong size (usually too big than too small)
-continually landing backseat
-having a gap between the tongue of the boot and your shin, either because you have chicken legs or simply because the tongue just doesn't match up to your leg
-boots that are too soft for you
-boots that are too stiff for you
-boots that are too low on your leg
so, if you 100% rely on a softer boot to solve your shinbang problems you will still get shinbang if one or more of the above causes is present. You could have the right softness but the wrong cuff height and potentially get shinbang. You could have the right softness but no footbed, and potentially get shinbang, etc, etc.
The only way to not get shinbang is to get the correct boot, flex, size, fit, etc for your specific body type. Sometimes that means go softer, sometimes that means go stiffer.