Ouch! You should know better than to go down on a girl who's OTR. JK. Hope all's well now.
This thread is entertaining. 10/10 for the tron bike shop, and the side by side backflip fail was awesome. I can't believe I've never seen that before.
Here's my contrib in the spirit of self humiliation.
Words of wisdom. When going for the Suburban, Urban tow in, hold on to the rope a few more seconds. Deceleration kills.