BACK IN THE SADDLE!..from the streets of a third world country.

skipimp_

Active member
Here goes:

Im lying in bed here in Cuzco, suffering from altitude sickness and trying to light stanky ass farts on fire with Alex. Problem is, these are the worst smelling rankest ass gases on the planet, courtesy of mass amounts of guacamole, and this hotel room is not very big. As well, in my urgency to catch my next fart, I smoked myself in the face with my knee, giving myself a bloody fat lip and missing the prescious flatulence I had been waiting for for 20 min. In Cuzco, I see some things. I see poor street vendors hustling me non-stop to buy some useless crap. I see a market where I buy a Spanish vs Inca chess set, come alpaca wool toques, some coco leaves, and my journal. Walked around, bought a pizza....it was on pita bread.. and realize that I still eat fast and feel unsatisfied. i watched a homeless man. He was wearing a coat with hundreds of things pinned to it: chocolate bar wrappers, flyers, plastic bags, dirty underwear...anything he could find. He was wearing a 2L plastic bottle for a hat, tied around under his chin. he was playing with his newest toy, a tape measure, measuring how far he was from the street, the wall, how long his arm was, his leg, his waist, measuring his sandals made from recycled car tires. All quite amusing I must admit. He was having a shit load of fun. I wonder what is in his head. Maybe he´s a genius. So tomorrow, we will be woken up at 4:30 to head on our 9-day amazon jungle trip into the Manu Reserve deep in the jungle. I feel like Ive been sucking on a disel exhaust pipe all day. Oh yeah, I have, it´s called walking down the street. I gotta go get some sleep. Lata.

Shawn

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
you should wake up 10 minutes earlier and get your game face on

'Fuck that song. I don't even like that song. That songs for the ladies......FUCK THEM! You know what I'm gonna do instead of that song? ANOTHER SONG!'

-Dave Grohl, Foo Fighters
 
as stupid and radom that was, it was acctluy funney. Write a whole bunch of them and try to make a book or some shit, or maybe im just stupid.

'My arm hurts, I think I had a Stroke'

-Some girl in my school

'At least my boy friend didnt finger my ass hole with strawberry shampoo'

- Words siad durring a Bitch fight

'Bagger my ass, its probley just Mill House'

- Homer Simpson

Sluty girl: 'Im so bad that i run with gangs'

Cartman: 'Yea well, I run with Ten Gangs..'

-South park episode
 
WHERE'S MY FUCKING LLAMA FETUS!!!



*******************

'yeti you're my new hero' - lineskier10

'the more it hurts, the better it feels' - Sarah

'i always make my bitches get abortions' - Dave Pauls

FROSTMONKEY

 
someone needs to make a compilation of all your posts on ns and publish it

and maybe proceeds go to the site??

_________________________________________________

Little Lebowski Urban Achiever
 
watch out for spider monkeys man

----------------------------------

'thats when you smack them upside the head and say 'yo bitch,i know this aint tennis but im a use my backhand!'' - Lateralis

Member of the 'lets help Sam loose some weight so he can possibly get a girl' Club.

Bonnnnnnnnnnnnnggggg
 
you can do better than that.

ThePopeShinesMyShoes

EastCoastPride- ''Dude, just remember the Jesus Steeze and you'll be fine because He will be watching over you.''
 
good story..but your others have been better

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-

1-800-BUTT-MONKEYS.com.net.lesbian P.O. Box 2, City Place, 47 Years in the Voluntary Pilot Firefighting Bear Safe Sun Screen Kids Please Call Now ~~capurnicus

'he's a very articulate black man'

(your ad here)

SRMC

-kevan
 
I got a reputation to uphold now..jeez, not every one of my posts are going to be load-blowingly hilarious. Im starting my journal of my adventures, i have a lot to write, this is the first one...i got tons more. Watch out for a post called The Chronicles of Shawn...it{l be a serious read. Im gettin your llama fewtus tomorrow, i finally found them..they{re in La Paz, Bolivia...in the Witches market.

lates peeps

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
man, i found the llama fetuses, and I ain{t touchin that shit...sooo nasty...you gotta pay me some big bones if you want one of those dried up lil fuckers

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
how much....seriously.



*******************

'yeti you're my new hero' - lineskier10

'the more it hurts, the better it feels' - Sarah

'i always make my bitches get abortions' - Dave Pauls

FROSTMONKEY

 
wow, inspired man... i say we name shawn the official NS Ernest Hemmingway or Jack Kerouac or some shit.

'I call your momma Roy Jones cause she raise chickens!'

...

'In this journey, you're the journal or the journalist'

-Talib Kwelli

 
Man....I really don't wanna touch one of those things....you probably dont either man....they're sick.

and you don't know me man, Im a big kid tryin to act stupid. it's ok cause you don't know me.

Im goin raftin for 3 days tomorrow high in the andes...gonna be hella scary. I might die.

lata

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
alright alright :-(



*******************

'yeti you're my new hero' - lineskier10

'the more it hurts, the better it feels' - Sarah

'i always make my bitches get abortions' - Dave Pauls

FROSTMONKEY

 
then yeti wont get his llama fetus.

'I am so smart, I am so smart. S-M-R-T, wait no, S-M-A-R-T!' - homer simpson
 
im back! yea, it was cool, lotsa poor people and mountains.

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
a 2L bottle for a hat!?!?!? thats fucking hilarious.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

everyone is entitled to my opinion.

-Ayrton
 
how do you fund all your crazy trips, i wouldn't mind doing something like that

'proud citzen of the NS Isle'

BE YOURSELF
 
it's called mad drug growing friends and parents who pay my way, and not wanting anything helps too, then you spend no money.

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
sounds exciting!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Proud Member Of Canada's Drinking Team

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Work Pays off later, Laziness pays off now :D

If you cant say Fu** at least 10 times in one sentence, you must not really be upset.

'blindblinds that was beutiful bro, i love it,' Snonasty
 
damn straight

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
its cool

SUck My AnTeAtEr

The more you want something, the less likely it will happen.

stealin and dealin screamin semen like a demon

My going rate is 25$

LICK MORE MOOSE!!!!

GROW MORE TREES!!!!!!

 
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