The trail is what you make of it. It's actually one of the cheapest things (maybe the cheapest thing) you can do. I thru-hiked for under $2,000. Per day, that's less than I spend living at home, by a good margin.
I certainly agree that hiking with a mob defeats the basic purpose of the trail. Reading reports from this year, apparently a lot of the trail got trashed a bit. Lots of garbage around shelters, Haunta virus is now present, and in general there were a lot more disrespectful morons out there than usual. This has largely been attributed to the release of that movie about the PCT last year, as well as the proliferation of the "leisure class."
Each year a dedicated few start the trail on January 1st. The experience, I have heard, is amazing. The skill set that it requires is much different (you actually have to know what you are doing), it will take longer to complete, and you will see almost no one else out there. The solitude and beauty sound phenomenal. This seems like it could be the perfect thing for you.
As others have pointed out, there are lots of other trails out there. The PCT has seen a tremendous upsurge in popularity, so perhaps you should avoid that one as well. The CDT is a very different experience, but you might like it. The Long Trail in Vermont is absolutely amazing. I end-to-ended it recently (doing the part that is congruent with the AT over again) and loved it. It takes anywhere from 10 days to a month, depending on your speed. For a bit longer experience, the Colorado Trail is great. You could also look into the Arizona Trail and the Florida Trail. I really like the look of the Florida Trail (haven't been on it yet), although it is decidedly not all wilderness.
I've hiked all over the US, and done a few ultra runs as well (such as rim-to-rim-to-rim in the Grand Canyon). If you do decide to go for a winter AT thru, definitely keep us updated.