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The art of courting a female in a small ski town is a skill few have mastered. For some, the Alta female is like the Porcupine; although it is often around, when you see one, you are shocked, confused and petrified all in the same moment. With the predicament of an often-outnumbered population...

Sitting on my unusually small couch, I looked at the time: 1:15 PM. I sighed and picked up the remote and confirmed that I was still watching Netflix. I let the next episode of The Office roll. And the next one after that. And the one after that too. After five more episodes I looked at my phone...